Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

hyenahell

Member Since 2003

Followers 118 Following 72

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Tuesday Sep 20, 2005

Sep 20, 2005
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
i'm sure by now you're all pretty sick of hearing me bitch about the damned hurricane. yeah, i'm sick of hearing about the damned hurricane as well.

things are plugging along. it's hard to focus on the day to day routine when i don't know when i'll have to drop everything and go home to pack up my things. but. i'm trying.

and it's lonely here. not that i didn't feel the same way in New Orleans, most of the time. i suppose it's nothing new. i have a couple of good friends here, who Rhys has known all his life. other than that... well, people do come up and talk to me. which is something they never did in New Orleans. i mean, at school. there seems to be much less of the whole pretending to be distant because you're just too damned cool to be bothered to walk up to someone who you think looks interesting and introduce yourself. that's refreshing.

most of my fellow grads at school seem nice, but they're kind of in their own worlds, if you know what i mean. except for one girl, who is loud and talks a lot. and loves jesus, i think. but they all make amazing art. it's intimidating and exciting at the same time. part of me is afraid i'm not going to measure up. i'm excited to get started making stuff, but also afraid and anxious about the future, and what responsibilities, obligations and contractual agreements i may or may not have... all worries. trivial worries. but that's how i roll.

i suspect everything will seem a lot more stable and a lot less out of control when we're able to move to Greenville and are living in a place of our own. and when i don't have to rely on other people to take me to and fro, and when i can cook and clean and order my little world exactly the way i want. yeah. it'll get better. and i'll meet more people, and make friends, and make some fucking awesome art.

in time, in time. it's just the waiting that's tearing me apart. it's the unknowns, the variables, the great sucking void. it's my head. all in my head. if i could just take a deep breath and accept what is, and what isn't, and what can and can't be known, or changed, or argued about... then i'd be fine. unfortunately, for me, that ain't my style. never was, never will be.

i am, after all, Hyena "The Hard Way" Hell. always fighting against the wind.

love, all.
-Hyena.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
cheech:
I was behind schedule on that because I wasn't sure you'd have a postal address to use. I can do a few things fairly soon, though... I mean, I can start tonight... it's funny, I'm behind on making Kikka CDs too, but I've just sent her a bunch of VHS tapes, movies and things.

So did you need anything in particular? I know I can tape the Kinks for you (I've got the song I fucked up on before), and I've got most of Eno's Warm Jets/ Tiger Mountain to one CD, and a lot of GbV, and then my regular old freaky mixes I sent to a dozen folks...
Sep 20, 2005
mngddss:
What a crazy little world you live in right now. So much going on. Do you like school though?
Sep 20, 2005

More Blogs

  • 05.12.05
    6

    Friday May 13, 2005

    blah de blah de blah. nothing new here, folks. i'm a bit pissed…
  • 05.12.05
    8

    Thursday May 12, 2005

    drinking coffee. tastes so fucking good to me right now. all my m…
  • 05.11.05
    15

    Wednesday May 11, 2005

    thanks to everyone for the musical suggestions. feel free to keep 'em…
  • 05.09.05
    17

    Tuesday May 10, 2005

    hmmm. let's see. it's tuesday, right? it must be, because it's trash …
  • 05.08.05
    8

    Monday May 09, 2005

    i slept almost 15 hours today. i usually sleep about 6 hours. …
  • 05.07.05
    4

    Sunday May 08, 2005

    alright. it's mother's day. everyone call up your mum and tell her yo…
  • 05.06.05
    8

    Saturday May 07, 2005

    well, after some time to myself and a lot of scribbling and contempla…
  • 04.29.05
    19

    Saturday Apr 30, 2005

    i'm shutting off my computer for a week. i'm putting it away. i won't…
  • 04.25.05
    23

    Tuesday Apr 26, 2005

    made dinner last night... burritos, complete with fresh mango salsa. …
  • 04.25.05
    14

    Monday Apr 25, 2005

    for lack of a better entry, i give you: 13 things you might not kn…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

24
years
1
month
5
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,614 SuicideGirls
  • 1,113,818 followers
  • 14,988,622 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,553,444 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Complaint / Content Removal Policy | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo