okay. so i think things are coming together. or coming apart. whatever's necessary, really... if that makes any sense.
i told my manager that i planned to quit. it was a tough decision for me, but i feel like it's a move towards finally ending this chapter of my life (in which i have become quite unhappy) and moving forward. like i'm shedding skin, or letting go of something very heavy that's kept me standing still. it feels good. i feel good about it. like for the first time in a long time i'm actually taking actions to change something in my life, instead of just suffering through it and being angry with myself for not doing anything about it.
don't get me wrong, it's still going to take a lot of guts and elbow grease and motivation on my part to get to where i want to be, and have the kind of life i want... but it's a step in the right direction, certainly.
in other news. i am utterly exausted. i did not stop serving drinks from the moment i walked in the bar (literally- there were people waiting outside that i let in and let sit and drink while i was opening up) until about seven in the morning.
usually Rhys works with me on Fridays- we have two bartenders on weekend nights, one that opens up, and another that comes in at one when it starts to get busier. but he's in D.C., and i couldn't find anyone to cover his shift. plus, i'd gotten up at 4:30am yesterday, and didn't get to bed until 9 this morning. at about hour 24 of being awake, i was definitely feeling it.
[i did get to hang out with JasonDemon between slinging drinks, though. which was very cool. so thanks for coming, man. it was a definitely one of two highlights (the other being my buddy Ed showing up) of quite the shitty night.]
so you think i'd get some good sleep, after it all, right?
nope.
got about six hours and was awakened by my screaming, piano-playing neighbors... (who the fuck plays piano during a heated argument with their spouse? honestly?)... they also like to throw each other into the wall, slam doors, throw things, punch furniture (but apparently only furniture that's against the wall we share). i hate them. and they move from room to room, too- they'll start yelling in the back of the house, where my bedroom is, so i'll move to the couch, and in ten minutes they're stomping through the house to the room adjacent to wherever i am. repeat ad nauseum.
so i'm pretty tired. and getting ready for another fulfilling night of bartending. and by fulfilling, i mean, thank god i'm quitting soon.
much love, all. and much thanks to everyone for the advice, sympathy, comiseration, and support.
-Hyena.
i told my manager that i planned to quit. it was a tough decision for me, but i feel like it's a move towards finally ending this chapter of my life (in which i have become quite unhappy) and moving forward. like i'm shedding skin, or letting go of something very heavy that's kept me standing still. it feels good. i feel good about it. like for the first time in a long time i'm actually taking actions to change something in my life, instead of just suffering through it and being angry with myself for not doing anything about it.
don't get me wrong, it's still going to take a lot of guts and elbow grease and motivation on my part to get to where i want to be, and have the kind of life i want... but it's a step in the right direction, certainly.
in other news. i am utterly exausted. i did not stop serving drinks from the moment i walked in the bar (literally- there were people waiting outside that i let in and let sit and drink while i was opening up) until about seven in the morning.
usually Rhys works with me on Fridays- we have two bartenders on weekend nights, one that opens up, and another that comes in at one when it starts to get busier. but he's in D.C., and i couldn't find anyone to cover his shift. plus, i'd gotten up at 4:30am yesterday, and didn't get to bed until 9 this morning. at about hour 24 of being awake, i was definitely feeling it.
[i did get to hang out with JasonDemon between slinging drinks, though. which was very cool. so thanks for coming, man. it was a definitely one of two highlights (the other being my buddy Ed showing up) of quite the shitty night.]
so you think i'd get some good sleep, after it all, right?
nope.
got about six hours and was awakened by my screaming, piano-playing neighbors... (who the fuck plays piano during a heated argument with their spouse? honestly?)... they also like to throw each other into the wall, slam doors, throw things, punch furniture (but apparently only furniture that's against the wall we share). i hate them. and they move from room to room, too- they'll start yelling in the back of the house, where my bedroom is, so i'll move to the couch, and in ten minutes they're stomping through the house to the room adjacent to wherever i am. repeat ad nauseum.
so i'm pretty tired. and getting ready for another fulfilling night of bartending. and by fulfilling, i mean, thank god i'm quitting soon.
much love, all. and much thanks to everyone for the advice, sympathy, comiseration, and support.
-Hyena.
VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
you really are too kind