Super duper lousy day...so ive written some crappy poems and proses and otherwise depressing works...
"A Bigger Boat"
I don't know. i feel so sad. like the world just has it in for me. i hurt. Physically, mentally, emotionally. it's hard to overcome. i sail through my days like a shadow. the lightest shadow on the brightest day. so easily forgotten. i am the scape goat. blame me, go ahead. everyone else does. does someone out there really care? a select few, i suppose. but in a world where life is a huge, fake, mechanical shark named bruce and you're stuck on a small fishing boat off the coast of Matha's Vineyard you begin to wonder if their really is Police Chief Brody to save you, or if Matt Hooper can really be the half assed astrounaut you need him to be. Is their a captain of the Orka, or are you sinking so fast you're likely to blow up like a air tank hit by a bullet? Who knows? And who really cares? At this point all I know is that I think we need a bigger boat!!!
"Painful Tears, Timely Death"
Time
My Time
All the tme
Every Time, Every Time
Why does time hate me?
Tears
Acid Tears
Every Tear, Every Tear
Why do my Tears burn?
Pain
Mortal Pain
Every Pain, Every Pain
Why must my heart ache?
Death
Sweet Death
All the Death
Every Death, Every Death
Why does Death allude me?
"Broken Bottles"
don't step on the broken glass that used to be a ship-in-a-bottle that is my life.Very poetic. I think it's the damn Sudefed or however u spell that. Luckily, however, concerning the above mentioned accident, I wear shoes and thick gloves and to prevent anyone else from stepping on those broken pieces of glass that used to be the ship-in-a-bottle that is my life, I will pick them up. I will not try to glue them back together, mostly because the smell of glue makes me sick, but also because then all u would see would be the cracks and half-assed attempts to fix something that was ment ot break. I guess it's time for a bigger,sturdier bottle because as I pick up those pieces I'm beginning to realize the ship hasn't broke, just the thin bottle it was in. Alas, as they say, the show must go on. And with the biggest prp, in significance not size, as good as the day it was "born", I can only say that I will regret the loss of that bottle and hope that perhaps, by some odd, chemically possible, spontaneous regeneration, it can stand by the ship in it's new bottle and prism the light of the glorious sun thru it.I swear to the Goddess I am not high. It's the Sudefed.
"Because I am"
invisible.
waiting for forever
as i stand naked
because that is my path.
I am free.
eyes.
they avoid me
as I stand naked.
because I am the truth.
I am free.
tears.
fall on the faces
as i stand naked
because it is so vulgar it's beautiful.
I am free.
wind.
whips around my body.
as I stand naked.
in the crowd of crying people.
seeing truth,
becoming truth.
waiting forever.
because i am free.
"nutshell"
This is me in a nutshell.
*muffled*
"GET ME OUTTA THIS FUCKING NUTSHELL U IDIOTS!!!!!!!!!!"
*scraping, rustling, screaming*
"nutshell update"
This is me in a nutshell.
*loud sigh*
"Just leave me here. I'll be fine. But I am thirsty. Do you think y'll could work on that?"
*rustling*
"Oh and maybe a pillow?"
"Funny kinda feeling"
Ugh.
You know that feeling in the pit of ur stomach that tickles you, but not in a good way, and u feel like maybe u wanna throw up, but you know if u throw up ur still not gonna feel any different, cuz ur not really sick to ur stomach, u just feel that way, but u can't figure out what's wrong, and u try and figure it out, thinking for hours what it could be and u finally cum to realize that maybe you don't know what's wrong, and altho u have no reason to be, you find urself gettin upset and emotional, and u kinda can't stop urself, and u kinda feel like sumone may be against you, and u feel like maybe all those ppl ARE really staring at you, so at the first oppurtune moment u check out ur reflection, and u see that no, nothing is wrong, it was never wrong, almost everything is right, except for that stupid, small, annoying feeling sumthin is wrong, and it bugs you, plague you for hours, like a paper cut in a spot where u cant but a band aid or that cut on the side of ur mouth that u did accidently, that u know if u leave alone, will eventually go away, but u just can't leave it alone, can't stop thinking about it, and once you get tired of trying to figure out what could be wrong, u begin to ask other ppl, then u kinda feel stupid cuz once ur done tryign ur damnest to explain what is wrong, altho u don't know for sure if u really know, they have this bewildered look on their face, and you can just hear them thinking,"Yea okay, whatever!" but you desperetly want to understand and there is all the possibility on the world that the person u want to talk to next will understant and possibly will be able to help, but ur afraid to try and tell them becuz u kno the reaction u got from everyone else and u don't know what to do and u feel kinda lost, and maybe like you wanna cry and everyone tries to cheer you up, but both u and they kno that u can't really cheer up sumone without knowing what's wrong, so they ask and they ask, altho inside they don't really care,and u start to get frustrated and evern more upset and u end up just walking away from everything, and having urself that good little cry, or maybe even a big cry, depending on how long it's taken u to get away from everyone and u start to feel one tiny inkling better?
If you don't kno that feeling, then i feel both sad and happy for you. Happy that u don't feel like walking away and crying right now and sad becuase I beleive everyone should experience as much as possible at lieast once.
"There"
At that line.
Where the ocean reaches up to lick the shore.
Where the bridge between change and stability is created.
That's where I stand.
At that line.
Where the clouds just barely mask the setting sun.
Where the bridge between reality and make believe is created.
That's where I stand.
At that line.
Where I can see you, but you can't see me.
Where the bridge between saying something and keeping quiet is created.
That's where I stand.
"A Bigger Boat"
I don't know. i feel so sad. like the world just has it in for me. i hurt. Physically, mentally, emotionally. it's hard to overcome. i sail through my days like a shadow. the lightest shadow on the brightest day. so easily forgotten. i am the scape goat. blame me, go ahead. everyone else does. does someone out there really care? a select few, i suppose. but in a world where life is a huge, fake, mechanical shark named bruce and you're stuck on a small fishing boat off the coast of Matha's Vineyard you begin to wonder if their really is Police Chief Brody to save you, or if Matt Hooper can really be the half assed astrounaut you need him to be. Is their a captain of the Orka, or are you sinking so fast you're likely to blow up like a air tank hit by a bullet? Who knows? And who really cares? At this point all I know is that I think we need a bigger boat!!!
"Painful Tears, Timely Death"
Time
My Time
All the tme
Every Time, Every Time
Why does time hate me?
Tears
Acid Tears
Every Tear, Every Tear
Why do my Tears burn?
Pain
Mortal Pain
Every Pain, Every Pain
Why must my heart ache?
Death
Sweet Death
All the Death
Every Death, Every Death
Why does Death allude me?
"Broken Bottles"
don't step on the broken glass that used to be a ship-in-a-bottle that is my life.Very poetic. I think it's the damn Sudefed or however u spell that. Luckily, however, concerning the above mentioned accident, I wear shoes and thick gloves and to prevent anyone else from stepping on those broken pieces of glass that used to be the ship-in-a-bottle that is my life, I will pick them up. I will not try to glue them back together, mostly because the smell of glue makes me sick, but also because then all u would see would be the cracks and half-assed attempts to fix something that was ment ot break. I guess it's time for a bigger,sturdier bottle because as I pick up those pieces I'm beginning to realize the ship hasn't broke, just the thin bottle it was in. Alas, as they say, the show must go on. And with the biggest prp, in significance not size, as good as the day it was "born", I can only say that I will regret the loss of that bottle and hope that perhaps, by some odd, chemically possible, spontaneous regeneration, it can stand by the ship in it's new bottle and prism the light of the glorious sun thru it.I swear to the Goddess I am not high. It's the Sudefed.
"Because I am"
invisible.
waiting for forever
as i stand naked
because that is my path.
I am free.
eyes.
they avoid me
as I stand naked.
because I am the truth.
I am free.
tears.
fall on the faces
as i stand naked
because it is so vulgar it's beautiful.
I am free.
wind.
whips around my body.
as I stand naked.
in the crowd of crying people.
seeing truth,
becoming truth.
waiting forever.
because i am free.
"nutshell"
This is me in a nutshell.
*muffled*
"GET ME OUTTA THIS FUCKING NUTSHELL U IDIOTS!!!!!!!!!!"
*scraping, rustling, screaming*
"nutshell update"
This is me in a nutshell.
*loud sigh*
"Just leave me here. I'll be fine. But I am thirsty. Do you think y'll could work on that?"
*rustling*
"Oh and maybe a pillow?"
"Funny kinda feeling"
Ugh.
You know that feeling in the pit of ur stomach that tickles you, but not in a good way, and u feel like maybe u wanna throw up, but you know if u throw up ur still not gonna feel any different, cuz ur not really sick to ur stomach, u just feel that way, but u can't figure out what's wrong, and u try and figure it out, thinking for hours what it could be and u finally cum to realize that maybe you don't know what's wrong, and altho u have no reason to be, you find urself gettin upset and emotional, and u kinda can't stop urself, and u kinda feel like sumone may be against you, and u feel like maybe all those ppl ARE really staring at you, so at the first oppurtune moment u check out ur reflection, and u see that no, nothing is wrong, it was never wrong, almost everything is right, except for that stupid, small, annoying feeling sumthin is wrong, and it bugs you, plague you for hours, like a paper cut in a spot where u cant but a band aid or that cut on the side of ur mouth that u did accidently, that u know if u leave alone, will eventually go away, but u just can't leave it alone, can't stop thinking about it, and once you get tired of trying to figure out what could be wrong, u begin to ask other ppl, then u kinda feel stupid cuz once ur done tryign ur damnest to explain what is wrong, altho u don't know for sure if u really know, they have this bewildered look on their face, and you can just hear them thinking,"Yea okay, whatever!" but you desperetly want to understand and there is all the possibility on the world that the person u want to talk to next will understant and possibly will be able to help, but ur afraid to try and tell them becuz u kno the reaction u got from everyone else and u don't know what to do and u feel kinda lost, and maybe like you wanna cry and everyone tries to cheer you up, but both u and they kno that u can't really cheer up sumone without knowing what's wrong, so they ask and they ask, altho inside they don't really care,and u start to get frustrated and evern more upset and u end up just walking away from everything, and having urself that good little cry, or maybe even a big cry, depending on how long it's taken u to get away from everyone and u start to feel one tiny inkling better?
If you don't kno that feeling, then i feel both sad and happy for you. Happy that u don't feel like walking away and crying right now and sad becuase I beleive everyone should experience as much as possible at lieast once.
"There"
At that line.
Where the ocean reaches up to lick the shore.
Where the bridge between change and stability is created.
That's where I stand.
At that line.
Where the clouds just barely mask the setting sun.
Where the bridge between reality and make believe is created.
That's where I stand.
At that line.
Where I can see you, but you can't see me.
Where the bridge between saying something and keeping quiet is created.
That's where I stand.