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i hate being so alone all the time. i just want to be free from all my pain and angry and guilt. im tired of feeling this way. im sinking further and further into my grief and destruction and I cant seem to get my head above water anymore. its driving me insane. im afraid i might lose Reno if I dont reach a good...
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im tired of being so fucked up

im tired of my past having such a big impact on my life

i need to change asap
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late today jerry and i are going to hang out and talk about everything.

im pretty sure we are going to end up taking a break for awhile.

hopefully this is what we need.

fingers crossed.
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how can anyone love me, if i dont love myself?

how can u say i love jerry like he loves me, when i cheated on him?

how are we going to be ok, if im not ok?

i wish i was a cat, life would be so much easier
entese:
yeah life is sometimes really shitty but not always
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i am such a fucking loser. i hate so much about myself and im so afraid of looking in my own brain and my past and reliving all the really shitty parts of my past that i just dont and its ruining my life and my relationship with Jerry and im so afraid to lose him.

i am drunk and i quit
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i hate that the only person i really have to talk to is jerry. when we have a fight and im feeling depressed and guilty, i cant very well talk to him. i feel so guilty about hurting him, because thats usually the reason we're fighting.

im just so lazy and afraid of hurting that i always put off the issue of talking about my...
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wow. so the whole "exclusive relationship" status and "had a wonderful day with my lover" sentence, translated to "im lonely, and disturbingly desperate to talk to your creepy butt, so flirt with me and hope i fall for it". that makes me laugh.

not only do I blog about my boyfriend, and have him all over my profile. why do men think that just because...
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RENO DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hung out with my love today. We went to his Na-Na's house to try and fix something, then to a late lunch (well brunch since we all got breakfast) with his dad, went back to his house, fooled around, watched some of Dinner for Schmucks, took a nap, fooled around again, got dinner, fooled around some more, then finished watching the movie.

I...
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