hefaistos

i have been sick this week, but felt better this evening. i even ate some fried chicken and gravy on potatoes.

this evening im going to my sons baseball game, and i hope its warm. it has been raining and cold for the past copule of days. i dont know if the weather has affected my mood, or its just a bio rhythm thing, but i have been extrodinarily mellow. all i seem to want to do is sit in the window and read books, or think.

outside my window is a beautiful birch tree. the way light filters thru the tiny leaves gives my reading room a wonderful greenish light, that seems to compliment the white of the bark on the tree.

some nice people came by today. they were awfully sympathetic, tried to do my dishes, and made lots of offers"if there is anything i can do", those kinds of things. i try to be polite. all i really want to say is, if you really want to do something, cure cancer. its hard not to give in to self pity. i've known for less than a week. im sure there are a million phases to go thru. i hate them all. i just want to get on with living.