yeah...you ever have one of those nights where you just dont want to go out but you sure as hell could use someone around?
im having one.
ive had less than an adequate amount of contact with people i care about in the past few days.....due to school, work, and numerous other factors.
i dont even want to talk ya know? i just want to sit and be held for a lil bit.
......nevermind. i dont want to be held. i dotn want to be touched. first i want someoen to connect with me and understand who the fuck i am and where im coming from.
seek first to understand, then be understood.........a saying i read in a book.
the problem with this is when i try to understand what the fuck is going on... it just gets more confusing and hurtful inside.
understanding others becomes all consuming. i try to understand their actions, i sometimes think i understand their intent... and everytime i think i do it turns to poo.
i think understanding, knowing, and worrying about myself right now would be best. i just seem to be dissapointed if i try to do anything else =)
im having one.
ive had less than an adequate amount of contact with people i care about in the past few days.....due to school, work, and numerous other factors.
i dont even want to talk ya know? i just want to sit and be held for a lil bit.
......nevermind. i dont want to be held. i dotn want to be touched. first i want someoen to connect with me and understand who the fuck i am and where im coming from.
seek first to understand, then be understood.........a saying i read in a book.
the problem with this is when i try to understand what the fuck is going on... it just gets more confusing and hurtful inside.
understanding others becomes all consuming. i try to understand their actions, i sometimes think i understand their intent... and everytime i think i do it turns to poo.
i think understanding, knowing, and worrying about myself right now would be best. i just seem to be dissapointed if i try to do anything else =)
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fragile21:
I understand exactly how you feel. I've almost gotten to the point where I'm completely indifferent to it all. I don't really want to feel that way, but I just get tired of a lot of my "friends." I pretty much only hear from them if they need something or if they need someone to vent on. Or we'll hang out all the time and talk all the time and then all of the sudden they just quit returning calls and shit. I hate being the only person trying putting energy into a friendship. I've started just washing my hands of them. If they're not going to be my friend all time then we're not going to be friends. I'm just not going to be treated like a 2nd rate friend, ya know. I don't think anyone really deserves that.
clover:
Thanks for the advice, I know what you mean I know a lot of people that have tattoos that they regret.
