grapefruit

i dont even know why im here haha
its more expensive than the other journal im subscribed to, but so much more entertaining i mean, as opposed to surfing around only reading peoples inner thoughts, i can surf around and look at beautiful women without their clothes on, too!
what a deal.
and im semi-hiding from the person who introduced me to the site.
i suppose we could be all buddy-buddy about it, hey, lets look at naked chicks together but no.
not gonna happen.
not like this, anyhow.
besides i just assume leave him to his own space and enjoy my few months while i have them.
something else about this place is that im beginning to step past new boundaries with myself and can express that a bit more openly here than anywhere else besides my own personal paper journals.
i sit around at the office and listen as people pile into my room and vent or gossip or complain or entertain its interesting to listen to each other regarding each other. it helps me with my own personal pruning learning others idiosyncrasies and where to step for best results
for example, the other accounting assistant whos been here longer than me has something against the word potty and another coworker is constantly alerting us that she needs to potty everytime this occurs, the annoyed enters my office with a new round of banter on how unprofessional the word is and how nice it would be if the coworker would just sit at her desk and keep her mouth shut.
this helps me,
now i dont say potty not in front of bitchy-professional-accounting-person.
mostly i just keep my mouth shut and listen. it pays better than admitting too much else about myself.
but i love working here. so comfortable most of the time, and as i grow into my skin, these people accept me because, GAWED, do they have all their own issues, too!.

something else.
i havent heard back from the apartment complex im supposed to be moving into havent heard back about my application and security deposit and all that. i hope everythings alright im calling to check now
and
i need to give notice at the apartments i live in now.
running out of steam, whoo hoo. i want to be home right now, im such a positive thinker!
and something more.
have a nice day. really, i mean it.

five things im grateful for today:
tamales,
the color red,
plants,
employment,
restlessness,
~and many mooooore ~