WHAT DO YOU DO WITH A DRUNKEN STRANGER?
okay. it's 12:27 at night ( or in the morning... whatever) I went to bed around 11:45.... I'm lying in bed, listening to the couple upstairs argue and move furniture or whatever it is they do at this time opf night... Then I hear Dave, my housemate, holler "WHAT THE FUCK???!" and then my name. "GET OUT HERE!!!" I sit up and go, "What? What's going on?"
and he says:
"There's some weird guy in our bathroom! I don't know who he is!"
I come out, and the bathroom door is open, and some really drunk Korean guy is sitting, fully clothed, on the toilet, with his eyes closed. Dave and I have no idea who this drunk, soju-reeking motherfucker is. Dave tries to talk to him. No response... So I make the trek out to the security shack outside, while Dave stands guard with a frying pan in case Drunkie Drunkerson gets rowdy.
It took me about 5 minutes of shouting "Adjussi!!!" to wake the old security guy up. Who is about my size ( 5 ft tall). and then some wild gesturing., arm waving and I was completely unable to express in Korean, "There's some weird drunk guy in our bathroom!!!" So, Officer Friendly follows me to the apartment. We show him Drunkie. He does nothing. Dave informs me that Drunkie's cell phone has been ringing. The security guy tries to talk to him, and we make every effort, with all of our vocab to express we have NO IDEA who this guy is or where he came from. "Friend?" "NO!!! We don't know!!! NO IDEA!!!"
So then, Drunkie wakes up, and answers his phone, and proceeds to have a conversation, while still in our bathroom. The security guy calls for security guy back-up, and eventually the guy is standing ( barely) in the living room. There is no move made to get the guy OUT. Officer Friendly keeps yakkking at him to no avail. Then we sit in uncomfortable silence, while I'm like, "WHY is he not outside yet? why does he get to make phones calls and stink up the house? get his ass outta here!" Dave's like, "Should I put on music? What's the protocol here?"
Finally security guy #2 shows up, and pokes his head in, like it's a party. Then nothing happens. They look for the guy's shoes, which are not in our apartment. Then, Dave and I have had it with stalling. Dave takes the guys arm and leads him towards the door. Then the security guard pushes him BACK towards US!! So Dave's like, "NO. He's leaving. OUT oUT!!" and keeps pushing towards the door, and DRunkie is loudly yarbling something... Then Officer F kicks my shoes around, and Drunkie's out the door and we slam it and bolt everything, and lock all the windows...
10 minutes after, the police show up. We just yelled, "Go away!!!" They're like, "Is everything ok here?"
Yes, no thanks to you.
Now I really can't sleep.
Questions? Comments?
*** ok, to anyone who is seriously freaked out, korea is a different place where people stagger down the street ( like middle aged people and old men and young ladies) on tuesday nights barfing and hollering on a regular basis. everyone in my office has reported a similar "drunk guy in the wrong house" incident... we're locking the doors from now on!!! ****
okay. it's 12:27 at night ( or in the morning... whatever) I went to bed around 11:45.... I'm lying in bed, listening to the couple upstairs argue and move furniture or whatever it is they do at this time opf night... Then I hear Dave, my housemate, holler "WHAT THE FUCK???!" and then my name. "GET OUT HERE!!!" I sit up and go, "What? What's going on?"
and he says:
"There's some weird guy in our bathroom! I don't know who he is!"
I come out, and the bathroom door is open, and some really drunk Korean guy is sitting, fully clothed, on the toilet, with his eyes closed. Dave and I have no idea who this drunk, soju-reeking motherfucker is. Dave tries to talk to him. No response... So I make the trek out to the security shack outside, while Dave stands guard with a frying pan in case Drunkie Drunkerson gets rowdy.
It took me about 5 minutes of shouting "Adjussi!!!" to wake the old security guy up. Who is about my size ( 5 ft tall). and then some wild gesturing., arm waving and I was completely unable to express in Korean, "There's some weird drunk guy in our bathroom!!!" So, Officer Friendly follows me to the apartment. We show him Drunkie. He does nothing. Dave informs me that Drunkie's cell phone has been ringing. The security guy tries to talk to him, and we make every effort, with all of our vocab to express we have NO IDEA who this guy is or where he came from. "Friend?" "NO!!! We don't know!!! NO IDEA!!!"
So then, Drunkie wakes up, and answers his phone, and proceeds to have a conversation, while still in our bathroom. The security guy calls for security guy back-up, and eventually the guy is standing ( barely) in the living room. There is no move made to get the guy OUT. Officer Friendly keeps yakkking at him to no avail. Then we sit in uncomfortable silence, while I'm like, "WHY is he not outside yet? why does he get to make phones calls and stink up the house? get his ass outta here!" Dave's like, "Should I put on music? What's the protocol here?"
Finally security guy #2 shows up, and pokes his head in, like it's a party. Then nothing happens. They look for the guy's shoes, which are not in our apartment. Then, Dave and I have had it with stalling. Dave takes the guys arm and leads him towards the door. Then the security guard pushes him BACK towards US!! So Dave's like, "NO. He's leaving. OUT oUT!!" and keeps pushing towards the door, and DRunkie is loudly yarbling something... Then Officer F kicks my shoes around, and Drunkie's out the door and we slam it and bolt everything, and lock all the windows...
10 minutes after, the police show up. We just yelled, "Go away!!!" They're like, "Is everything ok here?"
Yes, no thanks to you.
Now I really can't sleep.
Questions? Comments?
*** ok, to anyone who is seriously freaked out, korea is a different place where people stagger down the street ( like middle aged people and old men and young ladies) on tuesday nights barfing and hollering on a regular basis. everyone in my office has reported a similar "drunk guy in the wrong house" incident... we're locking the doors from now on!!! ****
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Cute picture.
Thanks for the love girl!