gasmaskboy

Well with everything being said...
and everything being lifted from my shoulders....

I R feeling much much better.

just a silly boi R I.......

yesh....

AHhhhhhhhrrrrgh...

I did it...

I told her... not everything...
not the insane details of how she means the world to me.

but I told her I do love her more then anything.

and I told her to not feel bad....
and I told her I would always be waiting.

and I'd wait forever if I had to.

until she is ready.

Now all there is...
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LOL I am a fucking idiot....

I was fuckin around with my butterfly knife....

not my old dull one my nice sharp stainless steel one that's heavy as fuck...

so I do this weird reversed grip thing so the blade is facing me... then I turn it back around and fuck up....

and so I accidently grab the blade... so I freak and drop the...
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If you try the best you can...
If you try the best you can...

The best you can is good enough.

Ahhhhh.... almost time for Xmas day....

All I can say about this time of year, is, it's cold and mostly depressing....

Spend time with the peoples you love.

and if you have no one there with you to hug....

I'd highly advise calling the ones you love....

even if you haven't since that nasty argument.

Love,

Ryan

Today was not such a good day....

not feeling well... left work early...
slept from 10pm till now.

going to go back to sleep.

Something was bothering me today not quite sure....

I was upset.... was weird....

it's ok though, all in all things aren't bad.

good night....

Love,

Ryan

hehe, last night I was so tired and brain dead.

but I had a gross tasting energy drink so I was hyper as all shit.

man that was fun.

I quite enjoyed yelling non sensical statements with synnove on my journal and yelling in the chat room.

I'm so gonna get beat up some day.

I had goody good sleepy with no problems, no waking...
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Good times, for a change....
See the luck I've had can make a good man turn bad....


So please please please, let me, let me, let me, let get what I want....

Lord knows it would be the first time.

Haven't had a dream in a long time,

see the life I've had can make a good man bad.

So for once in my life,...
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heh, who knows.......
things always make so little sense for everyone....

I have a few things to take care of.

and then I can leave this place.

family and loved ones need another short while before I can plan and leave.

Dunno where I'm going after though.

have a few choices.... have to see which works best so I don't die frozen in a car..........
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They won't stop until you tame your soul...


DON'T TAME YOUR SOUL!