So I just recently got dumped by my girlfriend of 6 years. She gave the slightly cliche "I haven't been happy for a few months, I don't think I love you anymore, but I still care about you and like you as a person" reason for breaking up.
The breakup sent me into a spiral of massive depression for about a month (it has been a little over a month since we broke up) and has continued in a slightly lesser form through to now. She was upset for a day or two, and then seemed to completely get over things.
She refuses to try to understand why she fell out of love. She insists that she "changed", and it has nothing to do with me, yet she refuses to think about (or maybe just tell me) what exactly "changed".
She has never been good at analyzing or understanding her own emotions, whereas I am constantly trying to understand my deep thoughts and emotions. While I was still with her, I tried to understand hers. Whenever she was upset she was always unable to figure out why and I usually had to point it out. There was many an argument that ended with "oh yeah, you're right, I guess I'm just trying to start a fight with you because I'm upset about _____". She enjoys living in a fairly superficial world and doesn't enjoy thinking about her deep inner thoughts, and she pays the price for it a lot by being moody, overly anxious, stressed out, and making irrational decisions.
Now, how does one get someone to delve into their deep emotions and actually analyze themselves without seeming like a dick? I want her to understand where her feelings came from because a) it will finally offer some sort of closure for me, and b) she won't hit a wall of confusion or depression in the future because of this and by overwhelmed by it (and although I don't like to admit it, there is a subversive c) she will take me back). Should I be trying to push\nudge her into this place where she doesn't want to go?
The breakup sent me into a spiral of massive depression for about a month (it has been a little over a month since we broke up) and has continued in a slightly lesser form through to now. She was upset for a day or two, and then seemed to completely get over things.
She refuses to try to understand why she fell out of love. She insists that she "changed", and it has nothing to do with me, yet she refuses to think about (or maybe just tell me) what exactly "changed".
She has never been good at analyzing or understanding her own emotions, whereas I am constantly trying to understand my deep thoughts and emotions. While I was still with her, I tried to understand hers. Whenever she was upset she was always unable to figure out why and I usually had to point it out. There was many an argument that ended with "oh yeah, you're right, I guess I'm just trying to start a fight with you because I'm upset about _____". She enjoys living in a fairly superficial world and doesn't enjoy thinking about her deep inner thoughts, and she pays the price for it a lot by being moody, overly anxious, stressed out, and making irrational decisions.
Now, how does one get someone to delve into their deep emotions and actually analyze themselves without seeming like a dick? I want her to understand where her feelings came from because a) it will finally offer some sort of closure for me, and b) she won't hit a wall of confusion or depression in the future because of this and by overwhelmed by it (and although I don't like to admit it, there is a subversive c) she will take me back). Should I be trying to push\nudge her into this place where she doesn't want to go?
Sorry to hear about the girlfriend situation, by the way. Girls suck sometimes.