Stuff still isnt adding up. I feel like I should be sadder. LIke maybe I didnt cry enough. I have my bad momments alone I like it that way. I know all of my friends arent on here but I would like to thank everyone for being there for me in my time of need. Im nervous for what my future alone holds. Im glad I kissed him goodbye but I dont feel like it should be goodbye. I want him home so bad. I want him to hold me. Its what I need the most right now. As much as friends and family are hugging me its not the one I need. Its unsettling to know that I will never have that. Im excited for his messages or odd things he might do. I know he is with me and I know he loves me as do i him. Sheesh this hurts so fucking bad. My heart physically hurts chest pains and such. Eyes swollen tears tapped out. I hope his smell never fades. I hurt. And nothnig makes sense anymore.
starry_eyed:
it was vbeautiful. you are beautiful. i am proud of you. i love you.
