Today is supposed to be a day where you remember those that have fallen in order to give you a better quality of life(in the US that is at least), but I feel as though I've squandered that gift. Looking back I feel as though I've never taken any big risks, never followed my heart, and haven't really done a whole hell of a lot with my life yet. Yeah, I have a pretty good job, a couple close friends, and a great canine best friend....but that's it. I don't feel as though I've found my passion in life yet, that one thing I love to do more than anything else in the world, a skill/talent that I excel at, etc.
For most people I guess there passion is that significant other that makes their life worth living, that 9 to 5 job worthwhile, and missing out on going out with the guys worth it. I never really thought I had found that either though...I mean, I had loved my ex, even when she left me months ago I wasn't really torn up about it. Until I found out a few days ago that's she's in a serious relationship with an old co-worker of hers that was always a "friend of a friend". Now I realize I never fully moved on and tried to discover myself. I guess I just waited around for the next woman to enter my life, I've always gone from relationship to relationship, fling to fling, one nightstand back to a relationship without ever really figuring out what makes me happy when it's just me by myself.
I'm at the age still where I am more set in my ways, my old friends have moved off and settled down, those that haven't either relocated or are going nowhere in life, and I've kind of tapped out my social circles. More and more I'm considering moving to a new city, starting over, meeting new like minded people, and living how I want to live...but I'm scared. The job market isn't as good in a lot of places as it is in Houston, I mean Austin isn't so bad but the costs up there can be pretty high. I guess the alt scene up there is a lot bigger than it is here, more my style of women I guess. I've never actually dated anyone I was wholeheartedly attracted too or head over heels in love with before. So that'd be a nice change. Even just to date around in a new atmosphere wouldn't be a bad thing.
Well that's enough rambling for tonight...hope everyone had a good weekend. :)
