i had my second anthropology paper due today at five o'clock. i planned my time well, and began the actual process of writing early this morning. it was actually an in-depth, Goffmanian analysis of how a guy hit on me at the Lightning Bolt show and the strange sort of social performances that go on during courtship. i dug it, took three hours or so on it, and, as a smart girl, saved my work every fifteen minutes at least. i wrote it on my laptop at a friend's house, and, after completing my writing at noon, i shut down my computer and relaxed until going back to my place at 3:30. i booted up my computer so as to print my paper and opened the file.
by some bizarre circumstances, the computer had not registered any save i made after 9:24 AM. the entire text of my paper excluding the first two sentences was gone. i screamed and ran every disk utility i could think of. i knew that, most likely, my professor wouldn't accept it even an hour late if he were there at 5. so i screamed some more, cried and writhed on the floor for one or two minutes, and got up, sat down, and started typing.
i rewrote my entire paper in an hour and thirty minutes and ran it to my professor's office, where outside sat papers presumably turned in on time. it was a success.
on the way back, i realized that i had written a four page long paper in an hour under huge amounts of stress at the culmination of an already exceedingly stressful week.
and i thought to myself that i could say something like, "well, this is what separates the women from the girls," or "this is what separates the scholars from those who just go to school," but all i knew was that there was a point in my life when an occurence like that would have rendered me essentially senseless, a writhing wreck of a mess too frustrated to fix her own problems. that somewhere down the line i developed this patience and tolerance and, hell, courage, and these things allowed me to just do what needed to be done.
so i'm really proud of myself, and i've told everyone i've seen today the story of how i was able to act when action was necessary. nobody's really understood the levity of it; i've been lightly mocked for self-aggrandizement, but i don't care.
i just feel like i can do anything now if i really have to. it's putting my entire life in perspective. in a week, i'll be back in atlanta with my friends and family (if only for a few days).
by the time i make it back to portland, i'll be fucking unstoppable.
by some bizarre circumstances, the computer had not registered any save i made after 9:24 AM. the entire text of my paper excluding the first two sentences was gone. i screamed and ran every disk utility i could think of. i knew that, most likely, my professor wouldn't accept it even an hour late if he were there at 5. so i screamed some more, cried and writhed on the floor for one or two minutes, and got up, sat down, and started typing.
i rewrote my entire paper in an hour and thirty minutes and ran it to my professor's office, where outside sat papers presumably turned in on time. it was a success.
on the way back, i realized that i had written a four page long paper in an hour under huge amounts of stress at the culmination of an already exceedingly stressful week.
and i thought to myself that i could say something like, "well, this is what separates the women from the girls," or "this is what separates the scholars from those who just go to school," but all i knew was that there was a point in my life when an occurence like that would have rendered me essentially senseless, a writhing wreck of a mess too frustrated to fix her own problems. that somewhere down the line i developed this patience and tolerance and, hell, courage, and these things allowed me to just do what needed to be done.
so i'm really proud of myself, and i've told everyone i've seen today the story of how i was able to act when action was necessary. nobody's really understood the levity of it; i've been lightly mocked for self-aggrandizement, but i don't care.
i just feel like i can do anything now if i really have to. it's putting my entire life in perspective. in a week, i'll be back in atlanta with my friends and family (if only for a few days).
by the time i make it back to portland, i'll be fucking unstoppable.
VIEW 25 of 31 COMMENTS
richiedagger:
nicely done. 
mobprod:
I wish I could leave you a testimonial...
