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firemonkey

London

Member Since 2007

Followers 52 Following 78

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Sunday Apr 19, 2009

Apr 19, 2009
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Seriously, I wonder what the point of it all is sometimes. There's always someone younger, better looking, more capable than me..... I'm starting to feel obsolete. I'm considering a life, alone, in a wood cabin up in the mountains, maybe with a Huskie dog and a high powered rifle for company.
There's times when all is good, and then others, when I just don't feel I can offer enough to make anyone think I'm special. I'm like one of those lame birds who never quite makes it into a David Attenborough documentary, one who's dancing and plumage will never be good enough to attract a mate, constantly overlooked, a 'good friend' to all, a special someone to no one.
I know I'm being melodramatic, but seriously, I've tried to tick all the other boxes that I thought I should, and succeeded with most of them, good job, healthy, not to mingeing a dress sense, but I'm just getting broody. I want that special some one in my life again, and I want them to be in the same fecking country I live in, I just want to feel wanted. Not needed, but wanted.
I should probably shut the fuck up and go to bed now.
I do love this site, and the fact that I can just put down pretty much exactly how I'm feeling at this point. If I were to wake up after a good sleep, tomorrow morning, then go for a run, I'm sure I'd feel very different. But it's still this evening, and my legs still ache after yesterday's attempt at exercise, so I'm going to moan and bitch.
Sleep well,
x




Bollocks.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
daisy:
I'm glad you listened. It's hard to listen sometimes.

Running, and exercise in general kind of help when you're a bit lost, don't they? Like, they give you a goal, and something to look forward to, and you feel good after. Bit like drugs i imagine. Except it's exercise. I'll stop talking now.

Thing you have to do is work out the POSITIVES about being single. They are there, you just need to realise what they are, and work on those points. For example, saturday morning is me time. I fanny about on saturday morning for hours cutting my fringe, and showering, and face masking and all that shit, and any time i've had a boyfriend, i've missed out on my saturday morning routine. So i am grateful that i get to do that. Your turn...

Course a guy like you will get snapped up, so enjoy your life till then. Are you feeling a bit better? Sometimes you just get overwhelmed. That's normal and natural. I don't really trust people who don't get overwhelmed by things. It's healthy.

I think we should make an appointment to hang out. Maybe not in the very near future. But some day.
Apr 22, 2009
niobe:
Happy Earth Day! smile
Apr 22, 2009

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