faye

I'm not going to tell you what it was about but I woke up this morning after only sleeping maybe 2-3 hours breathing heavily and frantic. Whenever I dream like that I'm forced to write it down out of habit. So I did, I got up and wrote down every single thing I could remember. 8 pages in my journal later I end on this note.

"Every time I have a dream like this I wake up and feel forced to get out of bed. There is a fear that if I allow myself to fall back to sleep I'll return to the same place in the dream.

So I wake - search for this reality then think and try to replay everything in my head so I know what to write down.

But even as I look around the room searching for any type of clue that the dream may be real and find nothing I have this fear in me. I'm always so afraid to leave the room I wake up in because maybe I'll step out into my dream. They feel that real when I dream them and I remember every single detail."

Which is so silly - because it's happened so many times before. Waking up...walking out that door and nothing being any different but it takes a good half an hour before I feel like myself again. Before I can feel relaxed and not afraid. Before that I lock myself into a small familiar place until I'm done writing.

Just when you thought I was normal eh.