Tuesday Mar 01, 2005

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FatDavid8, who has just developed the unfortunate habit of referring to himself in the third person, will be in Cancun until the middle of next week. Feel free to leave some hate-mail below, you poor, pallid, snorkle-free bastardos, 'cause FatD is having sex with the dolphins and you're not. tongue
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hermetica:
Sex with the dolphins?
I'm not sure whether thats hot or just disturbing..
I mean, really. They don't have lips.
surreal

Watch out for Montezuma's revenge... Cancun likes its salmonella.
anitalife:
I maybe be poor and pallid, but I am most certainly NOT snorkle-free. Incidentally, I've been getting a lot of funny looks lately.

Friday Feb 25, 2005

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So...it's my birthday. I'm 35 years old, or as my mother prefers to think of it, 420 months. I feel like I ought to have something funny or celebratory up today, but, really, I'm just not up to it. I've been reflecting on my life to date, and I find myself wondering: where are my accomplishments? These are supposed to be my prime years, and...
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rosehips:
Ha, he is neither British nor gay. Just shy and I think maybe feeling a little out of his league. God I hate that. Nobody should ever think someone else is too good for them just because of physical appearance. If all I cared about was looks I wouldn't have any trouble meeting someone. But I think he is gonna be ok. He just needs time to feel comfortable with me. We are going out again on Saturday. I can hardly wait.

Happy Belated Birthday. Hope it was free of bothersome medical procedures.

I would offer to take on a few of your extra pounds, but I work real hard to stay at exactly this weight, weight gains cost me money and you sound like you are already too skinny to me anyway. Unless of course, you are just really, really short.
paintedlady:
kidneys for breakfast?? that is uber gross!
i'll take some fat to pad out my ass and give me some womanly curves! wink

Monday Feb 14, 2005

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What with its being Valentine's Day and all, many of the ladies of SG are probably thinking to themselves: Boy-howdy, I wish I had a romantic fellow like FatDavid8 in my life...which is understandable as I am, as those of you who read this journal know, quite the catch. Those of you who aren't thinking thusly may want to reconsider after reading the account...
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toothpickmoe:
hurm
hotcurry:
nah, I work on a TV show.

Did the painting arrive safely?

Thursday Feb 10, 2005

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Today, after work, M.F. and I were toodling along in the car and, in a dilatory fashion, trying to decide where to grab a bite to eat. Along the way, we were also having a sort of sporadic conversation about the joys of making love to women from the woman's perspective. Somewhere in there I suggested that we go to McDonald's so that M.F. could...
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hermetica:
Hahahahahahahahhhaaa!

Consider yourself encouraged.
biggrin
ansia:
lol. Get a room? Why stop there? - we're gonna get a house ... and kittens wink

Friday Feb 04, 2005

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In honor of Valentine's day, which is relentlessly approaching, I thought I'd share a bit of my romantic history:

Back when I was in college, the arty-farty girl that I was dating, just for the sheer perversity of fucking during a Disney movie, popped Beauty and the Beast into the VCR. Surprisingly enough, everything progressed nicely bonking-wise until, during one of the musical numbers, I...
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niobe:
I think I love you!!!!

http://suicidegirls.com/boards/Dirty+Talk/63527/page8/#post3064002

kiss
scarydoll:
very cute. kiss

Sunday Jan 30, 2005

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One would think, what with my being on the verge of being Associate Professor FatDavid8, that I'd be receiving a bit more in the way of respect from my colleagues and the rest of the staff at the library, and one would be wrong.

Today, I was trundling along with a booktruck full of books from the HQ call number range (which covers sexology and...
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paintedlady:
umm, it was Gerd not Zygmant... not that that really changes the meaning or anything!
i'm just a sucker for detail!
ragefilledmuffin:
I'm glad your friend could make use of my Twister line. I liked the poem and wish him luck in getting published.

Wednesday Jan 26, 2005

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Today is my wife, M.F.'s, 40th birthday!

The party that her family and I threw for her in Chicago was a rousing, and slightly drunken, success. Everyone got to eat a surfeit of Italian food, to drink a quite possibly criminal amount of Italian wine, and to hear her family and me deliver numerous affectionate toasts and speeches of devastating comedic effect.

There was one...
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kobi:
Hey, thanks for the movie advise I'm totaly gonna try it out. I'll let ya know how it goes.

Happy birthday to your wife and congrats on the hot boobs err I mean boots.
arlo:
haha...boots/boobs...same thing right? my boobs actually are boot shaped, so people really get those mixed up.

you're funny. thought i'd drop by and say hello! let me know how those eyebrows turn out!

xox.

Thursday Jan 20, 2005

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My wife, M.F., will be having her 40th birthday next week, and we will be having a large, and fairly drunken, party for her in Chicago this weekend. She is almost visibly quivering with anticipatory excitement, so my usual January mood (i.e., sardonic, dour, and lugubrious) is beginning to wear on her a bit.

Miffed by my manner, she scolded me this morning as follows:...
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ragefilledmuffin:
Sarcasm is always an effective answer--no matter what the situation. Sorry to hear about the evil pizza.

I guess the red streaks in hair is sort of a fad. I was sick of blond (and it was wreaking havoc on my hair), but was unwilling to go back to just my natural dark color. The red faded out fast. But I got a lot of compliments on it and will probably see about getting it done again. Maybe the uppity girls just didn't get the red streaks--or were jealous that they didn't have the ability to think for themselves.
_tab:
Actually, being bored pretty much is my everyday life now :/

Sunday Jan 16, 2005

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Last night, Fishfork and Birdcup (my cats) and I watched the film "Narayama Bushiko" (known as The Ballad of Narayama in the U.S.A.). The cats were mostly snoozing along on the couch because the film was subtitled (they say that they don't watch movies to read; if they wanted to read, they'd pull a book from the shelf), but I noticed that, every once in...
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melladoree:
souds good to me, maybe you should pitch it to the network!
inkncarrots:
Congrats on getting tenure! That is fabulous! Good job. smile

Friday Jan 14, 2005

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I'm sorry that this is so long, but today, at work, I may have seen the most hysterical thing I have ever seen. Those of you who know me, which actually is none of you tongue , know that the twin banes of my working life are Slobby Bobby and Bob the Bum.

Slobby Bobby, my office-mate, is a pig in our office and has the...
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sarcasticmenace:
For me, it's a cornucopia of Mikes. Your story was funny..."The Tourette's Twosome." biggrin
laine666:
wel, palpitate away, sir. i just lost my last prospect this evening and the road to a new seems very long indeed.



and the kids from the methadone clinic are my new friends! They exist solely for my entertainment!!!!
wink tongue

i wish they did. at least maybe then i could get laid! surreal confused
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