Okay so Jack and i are ka-put.....He sent me a message about returning his checkbook that he left in my car. I'll do that. I'll mail it to him. I went over to Don's house and we ranted and raved about our crappy weeks to eachother. His whole ordeal with Sunny, and my whole....'issue' with Jack. We talked, consoled eachother, watched Pulp Fiction, and smoked our cancer sticks. I miss hanging out with Don. I really fucking miss hanging out with all of my friends. I know that it was eating Jack alive when i would tell him that i was hanging out with Jeff. But Jeff and i are just friends. And me spending time with my friends shouldnt make anyone jealous or angry. the fact that the whole 6 months that Jack and i dated, i completly pushed all of my friends to the back burner. I was with him everysingle day...all the time. The only times i wasnt with him was when i was at work. I completely stopped talking to and hanging out with my friends. Thats not right. I shouldnt have done that. And well if i want to try and hang out with my friends, i think i should be able to. For the love of god. Some people LLLOOVVVEEE playing on guilt trips. I cant stand it. As of right now im saying this....FUCK IT. Fuck pittying people who dont deserve it. Fuck always giving the benefit of the doubt. Fuck always trying to help people. Im so fucking tired of being taken advantage of. Im not going to seriously date ANYONE for quite some time. and when that time comes, they had better have their shit together. Because i have no time to sit and wait for a significant other to do so. Like things with me and Jack. I shouldnt have had to wait. I shouldnt still be waiting. If his shit was together, then we would still be together. Equal. Thats the fucking MINIMUM that i require. If you arent AT LEAST on my level, dont fucking bother. Im sad that The 6 months we spent together was such a waste of time. I wish we both oculd have gotten something from this relationship...but i guess its not meant to be or something. Im hurt and sad, yet relieved, yet pissed the hell off...*shrugs* i need a strong drink and some killer bud.... 