small animals beware! i'm on a murdering spree.
people who get all squishy about defenseless animaaals: go away now.
ok cool. this weekend my cat brought a live mouse into the house and let it go. it climbed into the back of the watercooler before i could grab its tail. so we poisoned it with RAID, tried to freeze it with nitrous aerosol (the cans for spraying out the computer), caught it on fire with raid plus a lighter and poked at it with various objects. finally it climbed out and i squished it with a stick.
i swatted a gigantic fly one time and it started spilling maggots out of its body all over my desk. that was fucking gross. yesterday i found one of those gigantic flies stuck to the window where someone had swatted it, and there were little dead maggots stuck to the glass all around it.
i am showing no mercy for the insects that infest this house, they are everywhere and they are dying all over the place. i am getting good at the tennis style flyswat out of thin air. they hit the ground with that little fwap-fwap and i get excited. there are dead insects stuck to the walls all over the place, some people around here think that squishing an insect requires grinding it into the wall until the insect goo fuses with the paint, making it very close to impossible to remove. I swear i am the only one that ever gives a thought to keeping this house clean.
in my opinion leaving a crusty bug on the wall is about 50 times worse than not picking up your own dishes after you eat. so gross.
we had a trail of ants for a while until i brought the raid in. that shit really does kill on contact.
when will i ever live in a house where i don't have to constantly deal with and think about bugs? when??? they drive me fucking crazy.
people who get all squishy about defenseless animaaals: go away now.
ok cool. this weekend my cat brought a live mouse into the house and let it go. it climbed into the back of the watercooler before i could grab its tail. so we poisoned it with RAID, tried to freeze it with nitrous aerosol (the cans for spraying out the computer), caught it on fire with raid plus a lighter and poked at it with various objects. finally it climbed out and i squished it with a stick.
i swatted a gigantic fly one time and it started spilling maggots out of its body all over my desk. that was fucking gross. yesterday i found one of those gigantic flies stuck to the window where someone had swatted it, and there were little dead maggots stuck to the glass all around it.
i am showing no mercy for the insects that infest this house, they are everywhere and they are dying all over the place. i am getting good at the tennis style flyswat out of thin air. they hit the ground with that little fwap-fwap and i get excited. there are dead insects stuck to the walls all over the place, some people around here think that squishing an insect requires grinding it into the wall until the insect goo fuses with the paint, making it very close to impossible to remove. I swear i am the only one that ever gives a thought to keeping this house clean.
in my opinion leaving a crusty bug on the wall is about 50 times worse than not picking up your own dishes after you eat. so gross.
we had a trail of ants for a while until i brought the raid in. that shit really does kill on contact.
when will i ever live in a house where i don't have to constantly deal with and think about bugs? when??? they drive me fucking crazy.
VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
okay. end of infomercial.
"REALLY WORKS!"