endquire

I got home about 9:00 PM from my traditional family christmas celebration. Around 3:00 PM this afternoon Cassie appeared outside of my building to pick me up. She had Shanna and little Johnny with her. Once I was Little Johnny. I was mildly prepared. Well I was pretty much ready to go. I wrapped presents last night using the paper inherited from my ex-girlfriend. I wrapped all of Cassies gifts together in one box. When we had our Mother coordinated family shopping trip some weeks ago Cassie was ridiculous and frustrating. She was seeking a Microplane for grating nutmeg. She did not own any nutmeg and after I pointed out the microplanes to her she commented on their price in a huff and declared she didn't even own any nutmeg. I did not hit her. She would have no problem with hitting me with her asp so I didn't want to set her off. No matter how much she needs a good smack I do not need a chipped spine. But I don't think she would stab me in the neck or anything in front of our mother. unless she was in a mood. But anyway I bought her a can of nutmeg. Then I bought her a gift certificate to william sonoma for more than the cost of a Microplane. I also gave her a CD. Sufjian Stevens Invites you to come on feel the Illinoise, or something like that. It is beautiful so I purchased one for each sister and my father. I Also put all of Shanna's families gifts in one box. Little Johnny was easy. I bought him a couple of animal planet dinosaur sets. Their was enough room in the box for the rest so I threw it in. Three books about politics for her husband. The federalist papers, something with the declaration of independence and other important documents and a john locke. At thanksgiving Shanna was talking about how she wanted to learn fencing. I found a couple of good books and tossed those in there. I used some amazon packing materials and a bunch of useless newspaper stuff. I even took the staples out of the tribune magazine and used that. I was good this time but it reminded me of the creative sadistic joys wrapping presents inspires. Cassies car was pretty loaded. we had to work to get the presents to fit. We went to our mothers. My mother has this whole thing she does before we go to grandma's house. It wasn't as fun as last year. Cassie is getting divorced so Josh wasn't there. Shanna's husband had to work. It was more quiet and low Key. My mother made Wings and shrimp. Their were some dips. I had a beer, some coffee, more than a little starbucks coffee liqueur. I also ate some candy. Cassie loved her gifts a lot. She was very happy. Shanna enjoyed her fencing books so now I need to find out more and find her supplies. Little Johnny seemed to be overwhelmed with his dinosaur sets. Perhaps it was that I gave him such bigs gifts yet last I knew he was calling me cake and embittered about the cupcake incident on his birthday. After he opened the smaller dinosaur set he stop opening gifts and just played with that. Well their was the wicked looking Tyranosaurus that wasn't quite scientifically accurate but he didn't care. After That we went to grandmothers house. Uncle allen and his creepy family were there. I was cordial enough. We had prime rib, which people make a big deal about for some reason. It was meat. I love big chunks of meat. Also cheesecake and Homemade Grasshopper icecream. After all that we went home. Now I can drink and ponder what the point of it was. At least everyone liked their gifts. My sisters and I went in on gifts for my mother and tim. They were happy. Maybe someday if I am fortunate to build the family I wish to have and I am fortunate to be chosen to father children it will be worth something to me. Well being with my sisters and mother is good. Although in the car ride to grandma's they kind of pulled a dad on me. Cassie bought me the complete farside which was a bit excessive but appreciated. It is so heavy. I could crack nuts or kill a baby with it. Shanna bought me a stollen, some candy things and a dvd of the original producers with gene wilder and zero mostel. The way it is suppose to be. my mother bought me some books on sharpening. She also gave me some dvds, strangers with candy and ben stiller show. Plus she gave me some nice ceramic bowls for cooking not eating and strange glass star wars ornaments. Their was lots of talking and thinking today. Lots of thinking about a lot of things. I might be doing somethng tomorrow. Some dinner lunch thing. Cassie will call me and pick me up. We are going out of guilt. at least I am. At least their is a southpark marathon on. I watched the Nutcracker ballet on PBS. It was nice. I am just so tired of this life and everything in this world. The only reason this life is tolerable is because of those Who I love. Those I can serve, and those who care about me. Everything else I am just waiting for its destruction. humanity amounts to a funny rash on the earths ass. Their are any number of ways that it will happen. It is inevitable. I hope that I can save those who deserve it. Everyone else can just come back after the find enlightenment or something. I don't care. I will just stop talking now.