dredredrizzle

Well. My 22nd birthday is a week away. And looking back on my year, I wonder if im actually growing up fast enough. I feel like im immature, irresponsible, like I have no grasp of how the world works. Frankly this scares me to death. I wont always have a safety net, and I have problems that ill probably have to deal with for the...
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something only has to meet your preconceived expectations in your mind for you to accept it. Say, if I were to beam an image from my mind into yours. If the image was accurate, you may reject it as foreign due to your expectations not aligning with it. If the image was horribly inaccurate but possessed the qualities you thought it needed to have, you...
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well. Turns out I've somewhat lost the ability to cry. Its... A weird feeling to say the least. Not that it's something I'd particularly like to do, but it certainly feels weird. About to start 2 jobs soon so I guess not being able to break down does help. So much stress, but so much awaits me in my future.

lately I have no idea what I want to do with my life. I lost my job, was lucky enough to pick up a new one, but it's just a general labor position. I remember when I was younger I felt like I used to be so much more than I am now. So much more confident and sure that everything would work out. I...
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I hate my antidepressants. I feel dull, my creativity goes away. My personality changes. My thinking patterns change. A little part of me dies. Because when you're different. When you wake up at night and sleep in the day. When you can't block out all the Terrible truths of the world. When you can't fit into the normal world like everyone else. You take a...
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I've been feeling really lonely lately. Things are going to get much worse these next 2 months before they get better. It's so hard to find friends with similar interests.

Sometimes I just sit here and think about how amazing it is that I'm a complex chemical reaction that has sustained itself for over 21 years now. That I am the product of my parents genetic code. As much a part of them as their arm or leg or any other part. I have no idea how long I can keep this combo going. But...
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so, i came into posession of 2 tickets to see deorro friday in san antonio (thanks larry!) . Have 1 extra one, anyone want to go?

so, i came into posession of 2 tickets to see deorro friday in san antonio (thanks larry!) . Have 1 extra one, anyone want to go?

see people, walk right back inside.

sometimes it's nice to stay up late and just think about your own existence for a while. I'll probably never get any answers to the questions i come up with, but I think the search gives me some insight into how i want to live my life.

So I've been toying with online dating for a couple of months... and it has been awful. about 50% of the problem is that i have a really hard time picking up on when a girl is hitting on me. the other 50% of the time things seem to go great and then the other party just disappears. I've only met up with one person...
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