I got hardly 5 hours sleep last night as I tossed and turned worrying about things I would have stopped worrying about had I just woken up, gotten upright and thought about them for a minute.
That part where I thought a spider was biting my hip was fun. Turned out not to be a spider or my hip, but my knuckle and my chest....
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That part where I thought a spider was biting my hip was fun. Turned out not to be a spider or my hip, but my knuckle and my chest....
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VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
Underrated
Overrated
If you're inclined to using either of these marks of non-thought, please don't use them around me lest ye incur a tongue-lashing.
PS. I give up.
Overrated
If you're inclined to using either of these marks of non-thought, please don't use them around me lest ye incur a tongue-lashing.
PS. I give up.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
kikka:
ehm i saw your comment about polish words aka dog mothers. IT'S A SWEARWORD! don't use it on GInny. Try that with a polish trucker, you'll see what i mean.
superflea:
Email me and tell me where Daddy's workin'.
There's a chance that my search for the power supply might take me through Mississauga. I won't lie - it's an insignificant chance. Given the fact that you're probably no more than a 20 minute walk anywhere in the GTA from a place that will serve stir-fried baby at any time of the day or night if you're so inclined, if I can't find one downtown I probably can't find one anywhere.
But just in case, it's not as though I couldn't spin by and say hello if the scheduling worked out just right...
...and if I could hold myself off from running home to set up my new computer.
There's a chance that my search for the power supply might take me through Mississauga. I won't lie - it's an insignificant chance. Given the fact that you're probably no more than a 20 minute walk anywhere in the GTA from a place that will serve stir-fried baby at any time of the day or night if you're so inclined, if I can't find one downtown I probably can't find one anywhere.
But just in case, it's not as though I couldn't spin by and say hello if the scheduling worked out just right...
...and if I could hold myself off from running home to set up my new computer.
This is why you review the materials before going in, kids.
I scheduled myself to run two 4-hour training sessions tomorrow for scant other reason than that's when I could get two fistfuls of new hires together while I was available to be in the building. Well, it's not actually 8 hours after all, not for me, at least. Turns out that instead of stretching...
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I scheduled myself to run two 4-hour training sessions tomorrow for scant other reason than that's when I could get two fistfuls of new hires together while I was available to be in the building. Well, it's not actually 8 hours after all, not for me, at least. Turns out that instead of stretching...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
lizfitts:
Thanks Nathan & thanks to Ginny. All Dogs go to Heaven, right? Right.
obd:
hmmm. twix, not reese's. noted.
Talk about being in the zone. I ran a training session for new hires today that lasted 4 hours and not only did I finish it on time, but I also had their attention the whole way through. After years of sputtering practice in school giving seminars and mini-lectures that said more about my comedic timing under duress than the topic at hand I may...
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VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
mk700c:
Big city down town... beep beep.. beep beeig city!
yeah, not Chichago, but Tranna. Dammit I wanted to stay and party all night long.
I will say that after 9 hours on the highway in Canadia both hither and tither; Tim Hortons can suck it. I'm done with you TIM!
yeah, not Chichago, but Tranna. Dammit I wanted to stay and party all night long.
I will say that after 9 hours on the highway in Canadia both hither and tither; Tim Hortons can suck it. I'm done with you TIM!
figmentation:
Cheers to "The Zone" ::lifts glass for a salute::
NOTES FOR DRAFT 2
-introduce Dave character to bring chairs out of the backroom while Bins being interrogated; in act 2 hell bring news from the salesfloor to Jeremiah as they close up shop
-force Jeremiah to leave the backroom to make closing announcements in act 2; have announcements regarding the buddhism seminar in act 1
-stretch out questioning over precisely what he was doing...
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-introduce Dave character to bring chairs out of the backroom while Bins being interrogated; in act 2 hell bring news from the salesfloor to Jeremiah as they close up shop
-force Jeremiah to leave the backroom to make closing announcements in act 2; have announcements regarding the buddhism seminar in act 1
-stretch out questioning over precisely what he was doing...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
mk700c:
a girl named Dave!?
I'm titilated.
I'm titilated.
siv:
did you? maybe i'm a fuckwad. i don't remember you ever puttin' in the exact order, just saying a general interest...here's my plan: just tell me how many you want, punch any random photo that many times on the paypal button, and then write me a sassy and provocative mash note detailing which ones you want me to fill that quantity with. (DANGLING PREP)
Right now my girlfriend is in the bathroom working on popping the zit that's formed on the inside of her left nostril, and though I've offered to help locate the head she won't let me in.
We have "trust" issues to work on.
We have "trust" issues to work on.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
_sarah_:
I cannot believe you just posted that... I'd have killed you.
maike:
I just had some Ralph Cramden flashbacks. And a good laugh.
Ha. Looks like I was duped. The Republican convention doesn't even begin until today. Some intrepid writer ass-fucked their own sense of style and syntax to produce this speech satirizing W's rhetorical skills.
Therefore everything's fine. Carry on, America.
* * * * *
"Then John Kerry gets himself another record by serving admirably in the Senate and there you go again. If you got...
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Therefore everything's fine. Carry on, America.
* * * * *
"Then John Kerry gets himself another record by serving admirably in the Senate and there you go again. If you got...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
mk700c:
Honestly, until I read "my first term as President," I thought that was a quote from Boss Hog. "Folks is naturally gonna...YEEEEEHAW."
Seriously doggy, if I've never asked you for anything before... get your couch ready for November; just. in. case.
Seriously doggy, if I've never asked you for anything before... get your couch ready for November; just. in. case.
ginny:
Looks like you're the one who's drunk.
To our cherished customers:
"Hardback", "Hardcover", it makes no difference, but please attend carefully when I tell you that any book, be it bound with glue, stitching, staples or spit, whether rigid as a 16 year-old's cock or floppier than grandma's teats, is, according to the proper sense of the term, a hard copy.
Always.
A soft copy is something else.
You fucking morons....
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"Hardback", "Hardcover", it makes no difference, but please attend carefully when I tell you that any book, be it bound with glue, stitching, staples or spit, whether rigid as a 16 year-old's cock or floppier than grandma's teats, is, according to the proper sense of the term, a hard copy.
Always.
A soft copy is something else.
You fucking morons....
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VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
velocity:
Shit man, I thought if anyone could do it, it would be you. My expectations of your manhood have suddenly drastically lowered.
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
scopitone6248:
Thank you, FAM, for ending my living hell.
scopitone6248:
At first I was deeply offended that you thought you had to link Seppuku for me. Then I realized it was an attempt to get me to cry in the privates.
A successful attempt.
A successful attempt.
Duration of a wash cycle on industrial use Maytag washer: 43 minutes.
Approximate time of two-way elevator trip between 17th and 2nd floor (incl. wait time): 3 min.
Running time of Neil Young's "Comes a Time": 38 minutes.
Therefore, approximate time before hateful little shrew began piling my wet laundry on top of the machines that had just stopped their spin cycles: <2 minutes
Where...
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Approximate time of two-way elevator trip between 17th and 2nd floor (incl. wait time): 3 min.
Running time of Neil Young's "Comes a Time": 38 minutes.
Therefore, approximate time before hateful little shrew began piling my wet laundry on top of the machines that had just stopped their spin cycles: <2 minutes
Where...
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VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
scopitone6248:
Ah, Friend For Life, I adore your new occupation. May it last for as long as it drives a certain someone nuts.
flux:
Are you prepared to take the hallowed position of Official Second in Command For Life?

Our first adventure shall be about my cold and cruel crusade against the planets blue lobster population. The odds of them being born is about one in five thousand. The odds of them being both dangerously addictive and intoxicatingly delicious? After a few months of hunting them to the brink of extinction, the world will finally know the answer to that haunting question and theyll have us to thank.
Quickly! To the briny deep!