dick_shrapnel

The meaning of life. Ah, what a refreshing topic. Everytime I try and explain it to people, someone starts jabbing pencils in my eyes.

Being that I am now blind and had my legs amputated from lead poisoning, I traveled to Belarus to find the answer. Before taking to the streets to ask the question, I called the American Embassy to see if Belarus had pencils. When they told me that they did not, I hopped in my wheelbarrow and rowed out into Town Square.

I started shouting, "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE?" and they threw me in a padded room and stuck me with blue-filled syringes. It turns out it was strychnine, so I had to have my arms amputated, too. Luckily, though, by the time they let me out, I had taught myself how to levitate. So, I took back to the streets.

This time, though, I had the question translated. However, I did not know what language Belarusians speak, so I played it safe and had it translated into German. That didn't work, so I then translated it back to English and then to Japanese. Didn't work. Luckily, no crazed infidels with needles this time. In a desparate attempt, I translated it back to English, then to French, then back to English, then to Farzi and back to German and I got "Sorry, but the Princess is in another castle."

Then came the pens. I never anticipated pens.