deuteranopia

Trump May Have Secret Weapon, Untapped Voters

It comes as no surprise to many Americans that Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump's campaign has tapered off from a high powered call for the country to return to greatness, and into a circus-y donkey show in Tijuana. Trump still only slightly lags in the polls against frontrunner Hillary Clinton, but a recent rally held in Durango, CO, may have been the turning point for the GOP's candidate: A Special Olympics Event.

Putting on his best orange mongoloid face, Trump successfully attempted to appeal to his own kind and to prove, once and for all, that he's not just a social retard, he's full retard.
"If you vote me, I make sure ducks, puppies, kitties!" Trump shouted at the top of his lungs. "We make friends everyone! Grab everyone's pussy! Hug! Extra chromosomes for everyone!"

The bold move to appeal to special needs masses blind-sided the Democratic nominee. "That clever fucker!" she glared at reporters, taking a sip from a flask of Tennessee sour mash. "You've won this round, you fucking retard. You've won this round."

The attendees of the Special Olympics all seemed impressed with the GOP candidate, citing that they liked his policies on allowing people with Down's to become licensed physicians and therapists, the creation of a Special Needs Forces detachment in the US Armed Forces, and popcorn. Trump declared that "if you vote me, I give you choice of free pet: danger zebra, duck puppy, or panda whale!" To which everyone with too many chromosomes shouted "Duck Puppies!"

"I make president good because money! Walls, Muslims, Jew, black! Vladimir Putin friend, Russia allies we make! Special Needs Forces to Afghanistan we go! Ride short bus! Snack Packs!" were the nominee's closing words.

The most daring of the new policies Trump put forth was the forming of the Special Needs Forces, or "Tard Team 6." The Special Needs Forces would be a joint task force comprised of special needs soldiers. The idea is that "who on earth would shoot a mongoloid? They're the perfect weapon!" said Mike Pence, Trump's Vice Presidential co-runner. The Special Needs Forces would deploy all over the world to combat ISIS and other insurgencies, and would arrive in theater in C-5 short planes and be given modified M4 carbines with under-barrel bubble shooters that make various farm animal sounds when fired.

After the rally, Trump went around, wiped snot on attendees, shook hands, hugged tards, and handed out varying flavors of Snack Packs.
Little Tommy, a retarded runner, told us, "I like him. He's orange! His hair is real nice. I got a Snack Pack!" The delighted Tommy triumphantly held up his empty cup of butterscotch pudding. "Snack Pack!"

With approximately 400,000 people with Down's in the US, Trump may have found his swing vote. The election takes place on the 8th of November this year.