Bonjour Mother fuckers,
In today's blog I have turned my rant'o'meter (or for my US mates my rant'o'miscellaneous unit of retarded measurement no one else apart from Liberia & Myanmar uses in the fucking world, you read it right, the metric system, available since the 1800's...not to be confused with the US feet, pounds, ducks dicks, bats wings, inches etc) to 10.
On my Rant radar, Facebook fuckers who post stupid random quotes about how mankind should hold hands and sing kumbayah, live each day as if it was your last, praise a rainbow. How puppies are a blessing, how fucking special friends are, how we should 'like' some bleeding heart motherfucking quote, person, deity, thing etc and if you don't you're part of the world's problems and are the spawn of Satan, Hilter, Stalin or possibly all three. Here's my fucking rebuttal ass monkeys, if you feel so strongly about the shit you choke my facbook up with, quit your fucking job! Go out to sea with the Sea Shephards, take up arms in Africa against the poor fuckers trying to feed their families through the misguided avenue of Rhino & Elephant poaching. Say Hi to Jane Goodall and ask if she wants a cup of tea. Buy an AK47 and hunt down Kony yourself! Get your preachy ass off the couch and start picking up rubbish in your neighbourhood and recycle what you can. Just please don't send me anymore dumbass posts about how I'm so lucky to be busting my ass working 40+ hours a week and struggling to make a living. You can just eat a fucking dick, In fact next poster gets un-motherfucking-friended.
In today's blog I have turned my rant'o'meter (or for my US mates my rant'o'miscellaneous unit of retarded measurement no one else apart from Liberia & Myanmar uses in the fucking world, you read it right, the metric system, available since the 1800's...not to be confused with the US feet, pounds, ducks dicks, bats wings, inches etc) to 10.
On my Rant radar, Facebook fuckers who post stupid random quotes about how mankind should hold hands and sing kumbayah, live each day as if it was your last, praise a rainbow. How puppies are a blessing, how fucking special friends are, how we should 'like' some bleeding heart motherfucking quote, person, deity, thing etc and if you don't you're part of the world's problems and are the spawn of Satan, Hilter, Stalin or possibly all three. Here's my fucking rebuttal ass monkeys, if you feel so strongly about the shit you choke my facbook up with, quit your fucking job! Go out to sea with the Sea Shephards, take up arms in Africa against the poor fuckers trying to feed their families through the misguided avenue of Rhino & Elephant poaching. Say Hi to Jane Goodall and ask if she wants a cup of tea. Buy an AK47 and hunt down Kony yourself! Get your preachy ass off the couch and start picking up rubbish in your neighbourhood and recycle what you can. Just please don't send me anymore dumbass posts about how I'm so lucky to be busting my ass working 40+ hours a week and struggling to make a living. You can just eat a fucking dick, In fact next poster gets un-motherfucking-friended.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
wolfwood1203:
Have you ever tried? Any creative writing can be tough, but it helps to keep at it, you eventually find your voice.
romany:
I appreciate your words of support on my blog, as always. And you are really hitting home with your rant, I'm sick of neo-hippie peace sign, rainbow colored fucking hemp vest-wearing self-righteous assholes who think they are better than everyone just because they don't eat meat or they give a fuck about stuff that I care less about. I love how people don't practice what they preach. At least don't constantly spam my feed with bullshit that you're doing nothing about. If you think we should all do this or do that, that's cool, it's fine, but don't bitch about how we should all do something about stuff that you're quite actually doing nothing about! But seriously, you put what I always think about into the perfect words that I couldn't express. I wish I could copy and paste that rant onto a couple websites, but I hate to stir up drama with those assholes.