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daysofgrace13ben

Providence RI

Member Since 2009

Followers 20 Following 25

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Tuesday Sep 08, 2009

Sep 8, 2009
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Well I am finally off for 2 days. Just did a lot of stuff I needed to get done-but I am still so tired and still gotta clean my piece of shit car. I did 9 days of overtime in a row. Well at least the paycheck will be nice. I am going to do my best to enjoy my 2 days off. Well 1 is coming to an end quickly but there is still time and besides I am a vampire- I'll be up all night ding shit.

On another note I got my heart broken once again. I am really pissed off an depressed and I can't let it control me like it has been doing. I need to snap out of it and wake the fuck up. Big deal some confused, screwed up girl screwed med over. From this moment on I swear I am over her. When I see her I'll just be mature and say hi but that is fucking it ----no more second chances. I really gotta stop being so emo with girls. I am not afraid of any guy, but a pretty girl can simply so easily break me in 2.

I have been in this depression since I met this girl. Yes I do have depression but this is totally to the extreme. I really liked this girl and it has cost me a lot of my sanity. For one I have stopped eating almost entirely and just simply cannot eat. In a month and a half I went from 220 to 190. All I do is drink and puke. I know it is not all because of this girl----a lot has to do with work and my depression. ocd. and anxiety in general. So I said to myself today that I am gonna change this to the best of my abilities. I am going to start eating number 1 whether I eat or have to shove it down my throat. Number 2, I am gonna start walking/running and lifting again because that has been proven to make people feel better. 3rd I am gonna start taking supplements like fsih oil, flaxeed oil,vitamin d etc. along with the meds that i already take and hopefully I will feel better.

Well to anyone that listened to my little spleel thank you and of course----Peace to all!smile

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