daysofgrace13ben

WELL NOTHING NEW TO REPORT. SAME OLD SHIT-DIFFERENT DAY. THE NEW JOB IS GOING WELL-PICKED UP A LOT OF OT. JUST CANT WAIT FOR THE PAYCHECK SO SICK AND TIRED OF WAKING UP SO EARLY-SO EXCITED I WILL BE STARTING NIGHT SHIFT SOON-I LOVE THE NIGHT AND IT WILL GO RIGHT ALONG WITH MY OTHER JOB. WELL I GOTTA GET READY TO PASS OUT SO----PEACE.

WELL I STARTED A NEW JOB TODAY AT THE CASINOS DOING SECURITY. I'LL BE WORKING THERE AND AT THE PRISON. I CAN FINALLY AFFORD GOOD BENEFITS WHICH I NEED FOR ALL THE FUCKING MEDICINE THAT I TAKE AND ALL THE DOCTORS THAT I SEE. I CAN ALSO AFFORD TO GET A NEW CAR. MY CAR NOW IS BEATEN THE HELL TO DEATH. ALSO CAN GET...
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WELL I HAD ONE OF THE WORST 10 DAYS OF MY LIFE. GOT DRUNK TO A POINT WERE IT IS JUST NOT FUN ANYMORE. RAN OUT OF MY MEDICATION-DIDN'T HAVE IT FOR 6 DAYS. I ENDED UP HAVING A FUCKING SEIZURE. MADE OUT WITH MY BEST FRIENDS GIRL WHEN I WAS DRUNK. I FEEL SO BAD-BUT SHE LIKES ME AND I KINDA LIKE HER. BUT...
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(:-smile

:puke

well after yesterday's rant i feel a little guilty. i cried and self pitied myself to much. but any way i do have a severe problem with my anxiety. a lot of this stems from situations that i am in but a lot is my own fault. i stopped working out when my gym membership ran out over a month ago. i always felt better(A...
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I FEEL I JUST CAN'T FUCKING WIN. I FEEL NOT APPRECIATED, MAD AT THE LIARS THAT HAVE RUINED MY LIFE, MAD AT THE FAKERS IN THIS WORLD, MAD AT THE PAIN I FEEL EVERY FUCKING DAY, MAD THAT SO MANY FEEL THE SAME WAY I DO OR WORSE AND THAT NOBODY GIVES A FUCK. ALL I FEEL IS SORROW. MOST PEOPLE AIN'T BEEN THROUGH THE...
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I AM ALIVE. THAT IS IT.

I HAVE A QUESTION-BUT 1ST HEAR THE WHOLE STORY. THERE IS THIS WOMAN THAT I AM IN LOVE WITH. I FINALLY ASKED HER OUT ON A DATE AFTER WEEKS OF BEING A COWARD, AND IT IS SO FUNNY HOW SHE JUST TURNED UP BACK IN MY LIFE. ME AND AMANDA GO WAY BACK. I WAS MADLY IN LOVE WITH HER IN HIGH SCHOOL BUT IT...
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IT DIDN'T RAIN TODAY FOR THE FIRST TIME OVER A WEEK. I TOOK A RIDE BLASTING SUBLIME IN MY PIECE OF SHIT DODGE NEON, AND SMOKED A BUNCH OF CAMEL MENTHOL WIDES. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I LIKE BETTER THEM OR MARLBORO MENTHOL. I GUESS IT JUST DEPENDS ON MY MOOD. NO FATHER'S DAY SHIT WENT ON. SCREW THE CHEATING BASTARD. I VISITED MY GRANDFATHER...
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today went well. slept in-it rained all day. watched some tv, played some guitar then went to my friends house for a little party. she was there the girl of my dreams. but i held back. lungs are sore, can't say what i feel. i will eventually, hell i just got done with a bad relationship so i should wait. any way i had a...
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well today i shaved the strap-look 8 years younger and can see my face is bloated from so much water i have been drinking. but i feel like a soldier again. left the band - they were not committed anyway-and acted like brats-none of them believed. no big deal-i will record on my own - i can play guitar bass and keyboard in my sleep....
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