Warning sappy journal entry.....
I don't know what it is but I feel so lonely at times...... so bad that I don't know what to do with myself lately...... I can't lie and say that I have it rough or my life right now is in a slump cause that would be the farthest thing from the truth.
I like to think I have a lot going for me at this point in my life... I have my own apt, my own car, 2-3 jobs, good friends, fantastic mother, I now pay every single bill I have, and yet I feel like I accomplish nothing from day to day.... I cry every night before sleeping for whatever reason... I constantly buy myself things in hopes to cheer myself up and then that passes within moments after.... Now I am trying to get a cat so I have something at home when I get there... thats living... once again trying to fill some void... *sigh* I know its not a depression disease or something cause god knows I have taken every pill possible and have only felt worse... I just really want to be in love and to be happy and for that person to be in love with me and to be happy and for that feeling to stay that way.. I don't want it to fade or pass after our time together has ran its course... I mean don't get me wrong I realize it takes a lot of work and changes need to be made in order for that to happen, but I have never been so willing and ready..... ever!!!!!! I know this feeling will pass and I will eventually find someone and the same process and routine will fall into place... but god please can it be soon....
have a good weekend....
ps.. i bought myself one of those fancy pic phones... more pics .... we partayed in sf last night.. and heres what we came up with...
STELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
.. i luh yuuuu gurllll
Bored with my new camera... waiting on the ladies to arrive!
and we wonder why we have love handles... nothing like a night of beer and then 2 a.m. pizza
the night just ain't complete without a trip to the porn shop...
I don't know what it is but I feel so lonely at times...... so bad that I don't know what to do with myself lately...... I can't lie and say that I have it rough or my life right now is in a slump cause that would be the farthest thing from the truth.
I like to think I have a lot going for me at this point in my life... I have my own apt, my own car, 2-3 jobs, good friends, fantastic mother, I now pay every single bill I have, and yet I feel like I accomplish nothing from day to day.... I cry every night before sleeping for whatever reason... I constantly buy myself things in hopes to cheer myself up and then that passes within moments after.... Now I am trying to get a cat so I have something at home when I get there... thats living... once again trying to fill some void... *sigh* I know its not a depression disease or something cause god knows I have taken every pill possible and have only felt worse... I just really want to be in love and to be happy and for that person to be in love with me and to be happy and for that feeling to stay that way.. I don't want it to fade or pass after our time together has ran its course... I mean don't get me wrong I realize it takes a lot of work and changes need to be made in order for that to happen, but I have never been so willing and ready..... ever!!!!!! I know this feeling will pass and I will eventually find someone and the same process and routine will fall into place... but god please can it be soon....
have a good weekend....
ps.. i bought myself one of those fancy pic phones... more pics .... we partayed in sf last night.. and heres what we came up with...
STELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
.. i luh yuuuu gurllll
Bored with my new camera... waiting on the ladies to arrive!
and we wonder why we have love handles... nothing like a night of beer and then 2 a.m. pizza
the night just ain't complete without a trip to the porn shop...
VIEW 25 of 28 COMMENTS
By the way, love the pics.
Much love to you.
yeah, edinburgh castle is about 3 blocks down from my apartment. i should go there. i've only been once. is there a particular nite thats funnest??
hope you find a kitten soon.