Lila was right, just plain 'ol apathy. Taken care of, and smokes were bought, and I'm not feeling bad about it, actually damn good. A little personal discomfort is good every once in a while, think I might more often when I need to clear my head, but I definately won't be taking it out to 40 - 200 days. I wanna be a good little slut-boy now. 
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you know that is your new nickname.
apathy blows. i wish i knew a remedy. i have a bad case myself.
XoXoX, LiLA.
thank you! glad you liked 'em... just me hammin it up for the camera, as usual.