cklarock

Scary but true - an ex of mine would get seriously turned-on when I'd whisper Buffalo Bill-isms in her ear. Yeah, I date the most well-adjusted people I can find.

You must have been working with some stone-cold suckas if they didn't recognize Ted Levine. I bet that made the jokes that much better for you, though. It's always a little better when it's a private delight. It's just a little bit naughty that way.

I used to have a similar joke with an awesome waiter I worked with. He was the one great guy you have on every staff (you probably didn't meet that guy, cuz he would have been you) who actually takes the time to see if the kitchen needs anything. We, in turn, would always have his back. Civilized. Whenever he asked if we needed soda/iced tea from the bar, I'd say 'It brings me club soda and lime. It does this whenever it's told.' He'd do the same when he was waiting for a plate. 'It plates the tuna and seared endive. It does this whenever it's told.' We screamed 'You don't know what pain is!!' at eachother any chance we could get.

I suppose that makes the movie iconic for me, no?



I've only scratched the surface of the modern art page, but this kicks way too much ass.

I wanna hit the Mega Lotto

Yesterday afternoon, I was heading into the city so that the lovely Lesley might adjust my coiff. Lovely women. All kinds of fun, but that's not the story. The story's not even really the story but, rather, the inspiration.
So, I'm headed south on Sheridan, past Loyola University toward Lakeshore Drive. I'd noticed a late red, late 80s BMW 325 in my rearview. It had an American flag draped over the hood, and had been cucking and dodging through traffic behind me for some time. At a stoplight, I look back and catch the guy behind the seat - 50ish black guy w/ glasses - taking pulls from a bottle hidden in a brown paper bag (as was the fashion at the time).
Another stoplight, and another pull. This time, after he closes the bottle, he reaches into the backseat. Why I was paying such close attention to this guy, I'm not sure, but I'm glad I was. From the backseat, he retrieves a hat with a brim - think Run DMC. This hat isn't black, no sir. This hat is red, and it appears somewhat fuzzy. I knew I had to keep an eye on this fella.
As we're winding our way toward the drive, I find him just behind me, in the next lane. I can hear the car. Sounds good. He's played with it a little, and seems to have done a nice job. Good hat. Good car. Definitely gonna keep and eye on this one.
At the next light, he pulls up next to me and shouts in my window.

'Hey man - you've got a real Cobra. Thought it might have been a GT with bodywork. Nice ride. What've you got going in there?'
Car guy. I'm so in.
'Running close to 385 right now.' I said. 'What is that an '89 you've got? Sounds real nice.'
'Yeah, thanks. It's a '90 and I've got it at about 260.'

Car talk at a red light. Fine by me. As we're shouting back and forth - geekin' out like we're supposed to - I get a good look at the guy. Normal lookng guy, but he's rockin' the fuzzy red fedora and his glasses have bright green (tree frog) frames. I knew I was talkin to the fucking man. We hit the curve that serves as the on-ramp for Lakeshore Drive and we both immediately make for the left hand lanes. If you get a good jump at them, there's long, clear road ahead. We hit it, and we hit it pretty hard. We play tag back and forth for the few miles until I have to get off. The dude could drive make that car move. No question. He may have had a few in him, but he was driving nice and tight. My car's different. Less tight. A little louder and a little more evil that actually necessary.
So we're haulin' ass without being idiots about it. No boy-racer bullshit, just knockin out a good drive.
Cleansing.
I get off at North Ave, he speeds past. We honk and I get a thumbs-up returning it with the sign of the beast. I'm off to my haircut and he's off to wherever it is that 50-something car geek guys in red fedoras and bright green glasses go at 7pm.
Immediately, I thought about our knuckle chat. Then it came to me. I love it. I could never do it, but someone should.

Middle 3 fingers on right hand, both flats between knuckles. 4 fingers + thumb on left hand. 2 lines on fingers once again.

OLD PIMPS
DIE HARD

If I see the guy again, he's getting the work, and I'm pickin up the bill.

That Ice-T story reminded me of something other than him beig the fucking man. I caught something on HBO a while back (probably while I was sitting on my ass for a few months with pneumonia). Over the last few years, HBO has been running various inside looks at various nooks and crannies of the sex industry. They profiled SG at one point on Real Sex and also did a mind-numbing expose on transexual hookers in Honolulu. Anyhow, one of the specials that caught my eye and had me captivated from the word 'go' was their coverage of the Pimp of the Year competition. It took place in Chicago if I remember correctly. Aside from the truly, truly impressive wardrobes on display (green for the money, gold for the honeys), the show was hosted by none other than Ice-T. He was definitely decked out in his furry finest, spoting bling that put even the coldest pimp to shame.
Who could be better?
They should have called the competition 2nd Best Pimp of the Year.
I heard at some point within the last couple of years that Body Count can be booked for something around $800 plus transportation and lodging. I think Anthrax is in that price range these days as well. Long story short, I think I'm gonna kick off next summer with the godfather of all backyard bbqs.

Sounds like fun. If you have some spare time in the Bay you should give me a shout, but I'll understand if you're booked with such a quick stop. Vegas would be sweet either way.

I got all the music links you sent, thanks! I finally set up hosting on my domain so I can do the same thing now. Need to buy another domain name, though, since the current one is not particularly private

I'll be busy in the office until 4 or 5 PST, but after that no plans really. I'll probably want a small window before 7 to wish L luck at work... our schedules are almost exactly opposite. I get up at 6:30 and head to work, she gets up at 3-4pm, I get off work at 4-5pm, she goes to work at 7, and she gets off at about 6am. So our phone overlap time is pretty much limited to the 5-7pm window and the 6-7am window... haha it's absurd but whatever, we take it easy

I'll grab more music as soon as I have time, hopefully at lunch. Back to work...

ahahaha i dled the mix already

Nap-ster????

Interesting..

i got mine out of a box of cracker jacks. maybe Darthy knows, i 'll ask him

Actually, that helped put things in perspective some. K loves that saying "Remember, you're not dead 'til you hit -10 hp" and has put that as her sig at work.

Yeah, you're probably right that I have too high of expectations, and that my friends kinda suck, so there you have it. **shrugs**

Now I just need to stick it out at work until after the first of the year, then I can get a new job.

we're a little busy right now. besides, wouldn't you rather go terraform mars?

[Edited on Sep 14, 2005 12:39PM]

I liked the darth vader picture you posted in [MEMBER=laceyglove's] journal. I used to drive a star wars car. I like star wars.

Love that site. Seriously. It's been duly bookmarked.
I agree with the judge's assertion that this information should be available in theis format for every city as a public service. It'd be really cool if they were able to bring the records back even further. I'd love to know the real story of what happened to my former landlady's late husband.

haha- you two are awesome! and kind to boot. sorry this is so short- ill write more when i get a little time. i gotta go hop on a bird for nevada in an hour...

You've had that look on your face for as long as I can remember, so don't blame it onSophie!

That candy WAS damn good, though.

The FSM is treating me alright today. How 'bout yourself?

i know that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but i have a fucked up story for you. not sure i want to broadcast it though... so i'll email you when i get back and the story has unfolded. the short version is that somehow i pulled some game out of my ass and got asked out (for dinner and sex, with potential for future sex encounters) by the kind of lady that i would previously have considered im-fucking-possible to score a conversation with.

details at eleven

Cklarock, you rock, I just wanted to be sure you knew it!

Bargain! I'll take it!

Hell yeah.
Beat him at his own game.
Be warned, though. He's probably regrouping over a large bowl of cereal at this very moment.
Be vigilant, but be sly about it.

I was hoping that, once the legal battles ended, that the panda folk would take a few shots at the juice monkeys. With the hippies falling short once again, I'm once again glad that I know a man steeped in the covert tactics of visual subterfuge.

If you, too, are traveling, you, too should be safe and travel well.

Again with the sellout! So are you really ghost-like in you appearance - blurry and pale?



Re: N.O., I agree that the beast lives within us all. While not all of us would go on shooting sprees in a broken city, it manifests itself in smaller ways every day.

AFLAC is a goose, dude.
















And Clyde, from Every Which Way But Loose, was an orangutang, not a monkey.