citrus

it's rained so long that i've grown somewhat accustomed to it.
did it rain yesterday? i don't know, but i would probably answer "yes" if i wanted to base it on pattern.
it suits my mood, though - the rain.

my grandmother calls and i confuse the time difference...
there is none, but i'm already thinking an hour ahead.

mom sent me emails yesterday wondering where i'd been the night before and if i'm "freaking out" yet.
she wrote that she is. that she's worried how she'll keep up with me.
i told her we'll have to be in touch by phone and that i love her.
i told her that i believe i'm doing the right thing.
we were fine while i was in arizona, while i lived with bubba in grapevine, while i lived on my own in northern parts of this city...
mom's are adorable. i love them.

classical music today and my office door is shut.
i had as much sleep last night as i'd had in the previous two. for some reason i'm more tired this morning than i was yesterday.

hang-time and good-byes tonight.
a wedding and then more good-byes to follow on saturday.
family time and fireworks on sunday.
monday i'll spend doing what i need to do. there is no shortage of that for me.

twenty days is very real.
over and over again start over.

sarah and i had really great conversation last night and i wish i'd saved it to read again.
but it doesn't matter, really.
we're both very excited that i'll be just down the line from her. we're already thinking about fabulous things we'll do together and i've left an open invitation for her to join me at the markets in prospect park on saturdays and she's left an open invitation for me to hang in her place, use her computer, lounge with her cat. we will make meals together and hang out her window... we'll introduce each other to new things and smile the knowing smiles when we think about the old.
we just want to love each other and it's a marvelous feeling to have a girl so good soon to be within arm's reach.
i can't even imagine how special life will be. something like it is now, only different, i suppose. i could not ask for more.

i want to see allison this weekend. i feel like i've got to get my fill. no number of pictures can represent the way she looks in the morning before she's brushed her hair or gotten dressed for the day. and no number of text messages can make up for the late night, deep and casual conversations we share, the time we spend watching movies, the quiet across a dinner table and critique of our food. there is more.
i wonder how amanda feels when i hug her too long, knowing she'll be gone soon and then we'll have more than weeknight plans between us.

girlfriends are so sweet.
life is so good.


i wonder if the little spider will live until i get to the city...
that would be nice - to have a friend travel with me.
ha!