citrus

sleeeeeeepy citrus




respect yer mama


~!


~rollin' with the homies~

drinkin' beerah.
eatin' good stuff,
bein' porch monkeys.

haaangin' on it

i'm'a go chizzle w/ mah nizzles


(ladies and gentlemen, we have a goofy fruit on our hands)



*clap clap... if yer happy and you know it*


~!



tore out the stars and kissed my forehead,
...
an ache that fell into a hole
...
you opened wide
soaked to the bone
...
so why are you
determined to run,
is it still night inside your heart,
too soon for the sun,
or do you feel like a rabbit
loving a gun,
never know when the shot will come,
and leave you cold
...
a rogue bullet
passing through every vital organ
...
too cold
...
(~deb talan)

i love how music is so... yum
heh.
i love to wallow in it's sentiment!
i also love how lyrics don't have to ask questions...
it's like JOURNALING!
bahaha!

~!

so, yeah...
i had a good time.

my brother showed up and it made me really happy. he never goes anywhere!
he bitched about how it was lame (we were the ENTIRE PARTY for an hour or so) and i promised him that it would get more crowded and that he'd be singing at the tops of his lungs before the night was over.
i was right. and his eyes shone. i love it when that happens. my brother's a handsome dog, y'all - and when his eyes shine i just get happy. he deserves it.

most of the "adults" (we're still "the kids", y'know) left early and mo/joe, brenda and i stayed for a while. we won some free drinks because i'm such a loud-mouth.
it's really strange being the only single person at a party... but i handle it well, i guess. at least they weren't trying too hard to "hook it up"
afterwards i sat up talking to brenda for a while and i feel really good.
i'm supposed to be miss indecision...
but i feel certain about some things... even though it's stupid because i CAN'T be certain.
isn't that ridiculous?
i guess the good thing to counter is that i have friends who work to convince me otherwise!
i have to be REALLY SURE in order to convince these people because i'm such a horrible liar...


apple martinis. i'm going to pay for all the sugar later, i think.

i have to go into the office, though.

a few more minutes, i guess.

girls...
let's be in touch, right?!





the good thing about being in the office on a saturday is that my cereal is here...
and so is my IZZE.
and it's quiet! i love being alone in the office!

someone should come over and sit under my desk.

(we need a smiley that raises his eyebrows "hubba hubba" like stuff)


mom bought me some clothes for my "birthday"... i think she felt bad that i wasn't here (she actually left me a funny message on the real day) and because she's been so swept up in bullshit... car being repossessed, the necessity to move into something more ~reasonable~ for them, all the medical bills and stuff for her husband. blah dee blah
i like the capri jeans she got me - they're petites so they actually fit and aren't so long on me... (she also bought me a yellow shirt and a vest - i have never worn a vest EVER)
but the pockets on these bitches are big enough to hold my cdplayer!
it's way cool - i'm walking around the office, digging through files, with my headphones on!


i have to say that i hate it when you notice one of your favorite things wearing out...
this cd already fucking has skips in it.

BUT!
i'm wearing my strawberry shortcake bobby socks with the little sparkly puff balls on the ankles and it's SO fun.



drinking ginseng makes my nipples hard
*shudder*
but WEEEE!



it's a little surreal, actually...
that my coworkers ask me what's wrong - that they can tell something is under my skin.
but i walk around singing most of the time - is something changed behind my eyes? i don't understand.
maybe because i'm not as social as i had been - but i'm just so ready to blaze a trail out of this place. and i really hate leaving a mess for other people to clean up : that's honestly the reason i didn't commit suicide years ago during those times of teenaged angst.
well... and because i had a feeling something would change my life - that i'm worth living for ... and because of other reasons. i'm just a dumbass, whatever.

they're sweet, though.
a couple weeks ago, we were celebrating one of our birthdays and the four of us longest term girls from the company were treated with the boss's credit card (he can be such a gent sometimes)...
i was panting about our waitress (she was REALLY cute) and the one i call mama (i'm the baby here) embarrassed the piss out of me by coming onto her "on my behalf".
i was bright red.

we have a good time.
it can be hard to find an establishment you're proud to work with, really.
i've done the corporate schmorporate shit before. i've done the teeny-tiny business thing, too.
this is just right for me for right now and has been for three years.
i just feel obligated by my grace to do a good job. but in the good way


i need new pots for my plants in here.
the poor violet is pitiful. and the spathiphyllum is just totally mutating out of the one it's in.
fun. i'll do that this afternoon while i'm picking up mom's day stuff.


razor burn under my arms!
ouch ouch ouch!