I only question my motives so you won't have to.
It occurs to me that I haven't respected my peers since elementary school, possibly 7-8 grade (although that was more a matter of hating/pitying/fearing my peers). In a perverse way, I kinda miss that.
March is going out like a fucking chameleon. It's not bad weather, just bland. Bland is not what I need right now, that's way too much like my life.
Which reminds me of a conversation Dave and I had this weekend. My sort of social claustrophobia. It's one part my general inability to go out (mostly money), one part pseudo-cabin fever (spending every weekend night at my place or Molly's), one part the large influx of people I don't really know or like into my formerly tightly knit friend group, and one part that even I do manage to get out, it's alone. In the next few weeks I've got 3-4 concerts I'm planning to go to, and I'll almost certainly be going alone, something that's becoming a phobia of mine. I need new blood, perhaps even to try dating again.
Books are starting to bore me again. I've been reading, it seems, too much. It feels like every novel is about one particular human tragedy, so that all the world is made up of strings of related and unrelated hells. Almost makes me wish my own personal hell were at least more interesting.
It would all be so much easier if I were a little more insane. I could use a nervous breakdown right now. It'd be like a vacation.
Who needs a drink?
It occurs to me that I haven't respected my peers since elementary school, possibly 7-8 grade (although that was more a matter of hating/pitying/fearing my peers). In a perverse way, I kinda miss that.
March is going out like a fucking chameleon. It's not bad weather, just bland. Bland is not what I need right now, that's way too much like my life.
Which reminds me of a conversation Dave and I had this weekend. My sort of social claustrophobia. It's one part my general inability to go out (mostly money), one part pseudo-cabin fever (spending every weekend night at my place or Molly's), one part the large influx of people I don't really know or like into my formerly tightly knit friend group, and one part that even I do manage to get out, it's alone. In the next few weeks I've got 3-4 concerts I'm planning to go to, and I'll almost certainly be going alone, something that's becoming a phobia of mine. I need new blood, perhaps even to try dating again.
Books are starting to bore me again. I've been reading, it seems, too much. It feels like every novel is about one particular human tragedy, so that all the world is made up of strings of related and unrelated hells. Almost makes me wish my own personal hell were at least more interesting.
It would all be so much easier if I were a little more insane. I could use a nervous breakdown right now. It'd be like a vacation.
Who needs a drink?