So I learn a little more about women everyday. But it always seems like I have learned the wrong thing and have to throw away something to add a new bit of knowledge.
I once learned that women love a "sensitive" man. That was a wise day and I felt pretty good about that bit of knowledge! But, right away I learned that women actually don't really like "sensitive" guys and that they think they are probably some kind of loser that cries at night and needs a "Mommie". Well that's not me, I'm certainly not a fuckin' cry baby sensitive guy..... what was I thinking!
Then I learned that women want a decisive man! That's more like it, I AM a decisive man. I have made two or three pretty good descions! But then I found out that they actually want their decisions to be more important or at least treated as equally important. Who the fuck do I think I am I to make a decision and not include them! Jeez, I must be a fuckin loser!
Well the next big revelation was that women want a tough guy, a challenge, a rebel. Well this is finally something that I can relate to! But then I discovered that women REALLY hate tough guys! They remind them of their step-dad or brother or crazy uncle who used to hit and hurt and abuse. Well Jeez now what do I do, I'm certainly not a women beating crazy fuck?
So, I started putting together the out takes, you know the parts of each wrong direction that made a little sense. I tried to learn from my mistakes in the hopes that women would think I'm at least intelligent. So I became the "Sensitive, tough guy, that listens", a guy that was "demanding" but always willing to be wrong and give a second chance. A guy that "listened to his mother" yet knows she is full of shit and gets pissed at everything she says! So I guess you know how this ends? I became a psychotic nut job, I lived under an overpass and used to talk to myself about the weather!
So finally I stopped trying, bought a bag of pork rinds, a six-pack of Bud and just went back to being regular ole' me. I put my foot down and took a stance. Damn it women, just like me for who I am please! If you want something you can change, go get a puppy! (Sorry.... that sounded kind of harsh didn't it? Maybe I should call my mom for advice before I say that out load?)
I'm now thinking the only thing left is to be honest and lay it all on the line. There is nothing to be afraid of, I just need to let them all know up front that I'm stinking filthy rich. I'm totally loaded, have more money than God and I'm just so sick of not knowing how to spend it! Man it feels good to finally say that!
Think that'll work?
I once learned that women love a "sensitive" man. That was a wise day and I felt pretty good about that bit of knowledge! But, right away I learned that women actually don't really like "sensitive" guys and that they think they are probably some kind of loser that cries at night and needs a "Mommie". Well that's not me, I'm certainly not a fuckin' cry baby sensitive guy..... what was I thinking!
Then I learned that women want a decisive man! That's more like it, I AM a decisive man. I have made two or three pretty good descions! But then I found out that they actually want their decisions to be more important or at least treated as equally important. Who the fuck do I think I am I to make a decision and not include them! Jeez, I must be a fuckin loser!
Well the next big revelation was that women want a tough guy, a challenge, a rebel. Well this is finally something that I can relate to! But then I discovered that women REALLY hate tough guys! They remind them of their step-dad or brother or crazy uncle who used to hit and hurt and abuse. Well Jeez now what do I do, I'm certainly not a women beating crazy fuck?
So, I started putting together the out takes, you know the parts of each wrong direction that made a little sense. I tried to learn from my mistakes in the hopes that women would think I'm at least intelligent. So I became the "Sensitive, tough guy, that listens", a guy that was "demanding" but always willing to be wrong and give a second chance. A guy that "listened to his mother" yet knows she is full of shit and gets pissed at everything she says! So I guess you know how this ends? I became a psychotic nut job, I lived under an overpass and used to talk to myself about the weather!
So finally I stopped trying, bought a bag of pork rinds, a six-pack of Bud and just went back to being regular ole' me. I put my foot down and took a stance. Damn it women, just like me for who I am please! If you want something you can change, go get a puppy! (Sorry.... that sounded kind of harsh didn't it? Maybe I should call my mom for advice before I say that out load?)
I'm now thinking the only thing left is to be honest and lay it all on the line. There is nothing to be afraid of, I just need to let them all know up front that I'm stinking filthy rich. I'm totally loaded, have more money than God and I'm just so sick of not knowing how to spend it! Man it feels good to finally say that!
Think that'll work?