chryssi

Oh it is already the 1st of August. Two weeks till school starts. Then peace.
Having a difficult time this week. Hubby is on vacation and was supposed to remodel
the bathroom, right? Well as usual we mismanaged and ran out of funds. So that really sucks.
Now I have a half started project. So now I have to wait longer for my whirlpool tub. Sucks.

Twenty three days till I turn 36. I sit and wonder what I have done in life and it's not much.
Mostly self-involved. I'm trying to turn that around and I think slowly I am. I'm learning more patience with my children and loving my husband like he deserves. My therapist tries to tell me that we are not compatible
that i have to accept that we may not belong toghether. She says once i accept that then i can really
understand what i want and he is not it them i will be able to move on.
I think that is crap! Yeah we don't have a lot in common, but we've been together for 16 years and three children. I cannot even think of leaving him. or him not being mine. he is the only one you suppoorts me in all of my emotional downfalls without him I would have been lost a long time ago.
But, (always a but) when i get really depressed i want to leave and run and go
to someone else who i think i love, but that is just a fantasy. He doesn't want me.

If this makes since to anyone please let me know. i feel really crazy right now.