Friday Jul 21, 2006

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I just found out yesterday that my grandmother's lukemia has turned into acute lukemia.The lukemia she had before wasn't that dangerous, but this id the rea thing. I am afraid that she won't make it through the chemo. The last chemo she had was very low dosage, and she barely could stand that. Noe the chemo will be stronger and i just don't know if...
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rowanmayfair:
You are such a strong woman. Being able to forgive someone who has caused you so much pain, I applaud you. Forgiveness allows us to heal & regain the energy that we waste on hate & resentment. I really can't say anything more than what Billyfivecrows has said. Good luck on your journey into finding out who you are.

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. I send you all my love & warm wishes xoxo
chryssi:
That is the first time someone has told me that I was strong. I never pictured myself that way. Maybe now with out the pain and anger and resentment I can find out how strong i really am. And believe it. As so as I forgave him it was like a great void inside had been filled. I feel like I am almost healed. Just a few problems left that have come from the abuse. I really enjoy knowing that their are people you care. Thank you so much, b. and Rowan.

Wednesday Jul 19, 2006

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I am finally on my way to healling from sexual abuse that happend as a child. The poetry I never wouldn't have written if I had not discovered this website has really been an outlet for me. Confronting my abuser and letting him know then pain he caused was very liberating from all of the bad things in mly life. Forgiveness of him and myself...
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chryssi:

feeling of freedom
renewed with hope
life can again be lived
without hurt and doubt

renewal of faith
and belief in oneself
the feeling of wholeness
and the acceptence of onself

these are the things that
forgiveness can bring

Friday Jul 14, 2006

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I've never written a blog before i'm not sure what to put here but im going to start with something i thought of last night while i was awake and should have been sleeping

fire
raging inside
destroying mysoul
rage
neverending
destroying my soul
my trust has
been burnt
destroying my soul
all that remains
are ashes
zitterbewegung:
From The Waste Land by T. S. Eliot
(In counterpoint to TS elliot...)

The third one is Azariel (Who burns my mind)
Making my fleeting flights of sanity
Turn into dust , guiding me (to the point of prophecy)
Beckoning me back To where I desperately want (to be)
And sending them back (to where they came)