christoscamaro

It's funny when people get scared of bugs. It's not Shadow of the Colossus here, people.

Mainly because the bug doesn't have a crappy horse that is impossible to control.

Growing cats is easy. Just get an empty box, and set it outside.

When you come back later, there's a cat inside!

Apparently, sitting your drink down on the recently deceased during their wake is rude.

Well, I think not having enough table space is rude!

When i was a kid, i'd turn off the lights and race the light and jump into bed.

I was convinced that i could run faster than light, because the tungsten element in the bulb still cooled down for a few seconds.

Being a kid is awesome.

Next time you go over to someone's house, find all of the mirrors and compliment them to your host, while you grin and give yourself a thumbs up.

I hate it when I wake up thirsty and my water bottle is empty. I feel like a mummy crawling in the desert at noon.

Sometimes I worry someone will find me dead, half off of my bed clutching a empty water bottle.

Cause of death: Turned into mummy.

Legos are pretty awesome, until you accidentally step on one while barefoot.

Met a cute chick in the park earlier today. Chatted with her for a few minutes, but she never responded to anything that I said. Then, she picked up a twig with her beak and flew up into a tree.

Someone should make me a wallet that just says, NO! in big letters on it. As a way to remind myself to save money. That way when I go to purchase something I don't really need, I can ignore what my stupid wallet is saying since this thing i'm going to buy is totally worth it!

Carrying around a small bag of gummy candy can be fun. Just hop on a bus in the morning, then yawn really loudly. When other people yawn, try 3-pointing candy into their mouth! Suddenly morning isn't so boring. Extra points for a slam dunk!

Humming birds are pretty tiny. Though, also dangerous. One flew around me for a while and hovered perfectly still in the air. As if to say, bitch, I used to be a dinosaur! Check this shit out! Then flew into a 747's jet engine and crashed the plane.

Well, actually it just flew off after a while, but you have to admit that would be...
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What happens if Jesus comes back, and decides he's Muslim?