cherrytrash

My head is a real messy place to be right now...so is my house. Chicken or the egg? I feel like my house is an amazing indicator for how I'm coping with life. Im a tidy person, I love a clean house and I genuinely enjoy doing housework but when the house starts to get messy...its a pretty good sign that I'm spiralling.

My marriage ended a few months ago and part of what is fucking me up is the fact that we still live together, there is no closure, there is no moving on, there is no making plans for the future..Im stuck, here in limbo...with no signs of either a door closing or opening. Stagnant.

I'm not sleeping, I'm spending more time in chat (another sign) and Im pretty much ignoring every responsibility I have...apart from Jasper. I love that boy, he is the one thing in my life that makes me smile a genuine smile of joy. Im scared of medication fucking with my artistic motivation, but Im so far gone this time that I lack the motivation to even pick up a paint brush. So I made a promise to a friend, that I would go and see my doctor...make a plan...figure this shit out, and that what Im going to do.

Something that has helped me recently is listening to Scroobius Pip. He has a way with words that gets right into your heart and mind and the tunes are amazing so I have him to thank for stopping the downward spiral before I fell too deep. (It doesnt hurt that he is lovely to look at either ) I just need him to announce a tour of Australia!











That beard