Oookkkk. (thought i as gonna do 3 k's huh?) I am one of those stupid girls. we all know this. the last 3 weeks have been so relaxing and enlightening for me. i am having fun again and planning shit for myself.
We knew it would only be a matter of time before he came running back to me. I estimated a month to Dave, he laughed and said he did not think a month. but i was fuckin right! I am always right when it comes to him. I know him better than anyone, i can read him like a Dr Suess book. one fish, red fish.... ;-)
I have asked a few people what they thought about it all. He asked me on a date friday, he wants to do it on V-day of all days. he has always hated vday, but he wants to. he went on and on about how much he missed me, missed kissing me and stuff. a week after we broke up, he was already itching to come back. probably even sooner than that. since josh kept talking about him bitchin and stuff when he was drunk. then when i kept asking him to come get his shit, he hesitated there too. He is a dumb mutha-fucka that will never learn. and that is ok. i am not planning my future for him, it is for me.
I am however, willing to live in the moment and try to pick up where we left off. 3rd times a charm. 3 strikes and he will be out. no more tries after this one. but it will not be easy for him. he has to prove himself to me. i am not promising anything. i will try it out. first sign of bullshit and i am gone. how the hell did Frida do this? How did she love her man after he was constantly unfaithful to her? I admire her, she is strong.
He knows that i am the shit. he knows that all these stupid little fuck toys are not even good enough to fuck in comparison. He is so lucky that i love his stupid ass. My friend, Jen, helped me out a bit. I cannot say that i was totally faithful to him, since i slept with several girls throughout our entire relationship. no more than a 6mths would go by that i did not fuck some girl. bisexuality is no different from heterosexuality. i am going to see how long i can go being faithful to him. no more girls i guess. maybe if i only sleep with him, he will not want to venture off the path as well. i am not totally innocent and i will not pretend to be. that is why i cannot hate him for being stupid. stupid people cannot help it that they are stupid. they need someone to teach them, someone to show them how. if i cannot train him to be only mine, than i dont need him. only time will tell.
so i will be a stripper this year. that is my goal for this summer. i have lost 15lbs within the last 4 weeks and i plan to lose at least another 5lbs this month. my goal is 10lbs a month until spring (may or june). and if i can get more classes like the one Emily has me going to next month, i will be ready for sure (exotic dance). i hope all of you will come watch me dance and join suicide girls when i start doing that too. i will pay for your memberships if that will help. lol. i guess that is all, this damn thing is long, sorry.
We knew it would only be a matter of time before he came running back to me. I estimated a month to Dave, he laughed and said he did not think a month. but i was fuckin right! I am always right when it comes to him. I know him better than anyone, i can read him like a Dr Suess book. one fish, red fish.... ;-)
I have asked a few people what they thought about it all. He asked me on a date friday, he wants to do it on V-day of all days. he has always hated vday, but he wants to. he went on and on about how much he missed me, missed kissing me and stuff. a week after we broke up, he was already itching to come back. probably even sooner than that. since josh kept talking about him bitchin and stuff when he was drunk. then when i kept asking him to come get his shit, he hesitated there too. He is a dumb mutha-fucka that will never learn. and that is ok. i am not planning my future for him, it is for me.
I am however, willing to live in the moment and try to pick up where we left off. 3rd times a charm. 3 strikes and he will be out. no more tries after this one. but it will not be easy for him. he has to prove himself to me. i am not promising anything. i will try it out. first sign of bullshit and i am gone. how the hell did Frida do this? How did she love her man after he was constantly unfaithful to her? I admire her, she is strong.
He knows that i am the shit. he knows that all these stupid little fuck toys are not even good enough to fuck in comparison. He is so lucky that i love his stupid ass. My friend, Jen, helped me out a bit. I cannot say that i was totally faithful to him, since i slept with several girls throughout our entire relationship. no more than a 6mths would go by that i did not fuck some girl. bisexuality is no different from heterosexuality. i am going to see how long i can go being faithful to him. no more girls i guess. maybe if i only sleep with him, he will not want to venture off the path as well. i am not totally innocent and i will not pretend to be. that is why i cannot hate him for being stupid. stupid people cannot help it that they are stupid. they need someone to teach them, someone to show them how. if i cannot train him to be only mine, than i dont need him. only time will tell.
so i will be a stripper this year. that is my goal for this summer. i have lost 15lbs within the last 4 weeks and i plan to lose at least another 5lbs this month. my goal is 10lbs a month until spring (may or june). and if i can get more classes like the one Emily has me going to next month, i will be ready for sure (exotic dance). i hope all of you will come watch me dance and join suicide girls when i start doing that too. i will pay for your memberships if that will help. lol. i guess that is all, this damn thing is long, sorry.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
texax7:
You've got a lot going on emotionally. Hope it works out for you.
cherbearr:
i know i am weird. and i do have issues. i am just going to see where this takes me and then decide. ya know. thanks both of u. i like hearing what other people think. it helps. ;-)