Okay, why not do my Least Favorite Songs from the Blender list? Eden correctly guessed that I'd been watching the VH1 version on Sunday... which was slightly different and, WhiskeyFightPit take note, was more centered around songs like "Macarena" and other dumb dance stuff which I believe the Blender guys said they tried to deliberately avoid. I'll try to go look later... I'm typing right now.
some Least Favorite Songs
1. "Follow Me" - Uncle Kracker. It is only fair to admit that my friend Jimmy has campainged pretty hard for me to acknowledge that Uncle Kracker is the Worst Thing Alive in music. I have to admit, when you sit down and think about it, Uncle Kracker is pretty despicable... but ya know, Jimmy loves The Goo Goo Dolls, so... he's not perfect, either.
2. "Mesmerize" - Ja Rule and Ashanti. I don't actually know this song... but I can't stand Ja Rule's voice, or his weird eyelids or spindly moustache. The fact that he's considered sexy staggers me... and don't get me started on Usher. (I know this isn't very Buddhist of me... but if braveliltoaster can trash Huge Jackman's wife a bit, hey, give me my air-time.)
3. "Breakfast at Tiffany's" - Deep Blue Something. Forced sunniness, which I rank worse than the Rembrandt's forced sunniness.
4. "I'll Do Anything for Love..." - Meatloaf. Most of his stuff is detestable. I would say Tim Curry should have actually killed him after he finished his best song, in Rocky Horror.
5. "any stupid racist song of his" - Toby Keith. Any guy who chuckles when singing to an Arab antagonist about "dropping bombs all over your holy land" is a straight-up racist... yeah, Toby, just drop 'em indiscriminantly anywhere, kinda like how thousands of people died in Afghanistan and Iraq who had nothing to do with the armies or al-Queda, and the press never bother to cover it because the Bush government told 'em "Just cover good news," and they all did just that, and we have a "free press". Great.
6. "Rollin'" - Limp Bisquick. Please, people.
7. "Pumps and a Bump" - Hammer. I would do almost anything for Hammer... but I won't do this. This is a terrrrible, terrrrible song.
8. "I'll Be Missing You" - Puff Diddy. See, I already don't like the Police song. I got sick of it when it was new. This thing? I'm just not down with it.
9. "We Built This City" - Starship. The actual winner of Blender's list... it might have won on VH1 too. It is terrible. I once did an improv version of this in high school. It was one of the songs in the printed-lyrics pages of some magazine (Hit Parader?) and my friend Corey just ad-libbed the sickest, foulest, most evil swear-word version of it... that was his basic approach to every song. Start sick, then get sicker.
10. "You're the Inspiration" - Chicago. There are actually several things on the list I could put at this point... but bad, wimpy 1980s Peter Cetera will do. This is the kinda thing where rock and roll ends and just gutless, gutless pop begins.
Honorable mentions -- People always talk about how bad Vanilla Ice and Snow and things like that were, but nobody mentions how thoroughly contemptible and beatdown-worthy Another Bad Creation were. Kids with no talent rapping like they're gonna beat your ass, and they're like 8 years old?? Sounds to me like 4 or 5 asses begging for a size-12 steel boot. I don't know where they are today, but I hope it's hell.
Also, I despise Eminem. That whiny, whiny voice acting all hard... reminds me of Another Bad Creation.
some Least Favorite Songs
1. "Follow Me" - Uncle Kracker. It is only fair to admit that my friend Jimmy has campainged pretty hard for me to acknowledge that Uncle Kracker is the Worst Thing Alive in music. I have to admit, when you sit down and think about it, Uncle Kracker is pretty despicable... but ya know, Jimmy loves The Goo Goo Dolls, so... he's not perfect, either.
2. "Mesmerize" - Ja Rule and Ashanti. I don't actually know this song... but I can't stand Ja Rule's voice, or his weird eyelids or spindly moustache. The fact that he's considered sexy staggers me... and don't get me started on Usher. (I know this isn't very Buddhist of me... but if braveliltoaster can trash Huge Jackman's wife a bit, hey, give me my air-time.)
3. "Breakfast at Tiffany's" - Deep Blue Something. Forced sunniness, which I rank worse than the Rembrandt's forced sunniness.
4. "I'll Do Anything for Love..." - Meatloaf. Most of his stuff is detestable. I would say Tim Curry should have actually killed him after he finished his best song, in Rocky Horror.
5. "any stupid racist song of his" - Toby Keith. Any guy who chuckles when singing to an Arab antagonist about "dropping bombs all over your holy land" is a straight-up racist... yeah, Toby, just drop 'em indiscriminantly anywhere, kinda like how thousands of people died in Afghanistan and Iraq who had nothing to do with the armies or al-Queda, and the press never bother to cover it because the Bush government told 'em "Just cover good news," and they all did just that, and we have a "free press". Great.
6. "Rollin'" - Limp Bisquick. Please, people.
7. "Pumps and a Bump" - Hammer. I would do almost anything for Hammer... but I won't do this. This is a terrrrible, terrrrible song.
8. "I'll Be Missing You" - Puff Diddy. See, I already don't like the Police song. I got sick of it when it was new. This thing? I'm just not down with it.
9. "We Built This City" - Starship. The actual winner of Blender's list... it might have won on VH1 too. It is terrible. I once did an improv version of this in high school. It was one of the songs in the printed-lyrics pages of some magazine (Hit Parader?) and my friend Corey just ad-libbed the sickest, foulest, most evil swear-word version of it... that was his basic approach to every song. Start sick, then get sicker.
10. "You're the Inspiration" - Chicago. There are actually several things on the list I could put at this point... but bad, wimpy 1980s Peter Cetera will do. This is the kinda thing where rock and roll ends and just gutless, gutless pop begins.
Honorable mentions -- People always talk about how bad Vanilla Ice and Snow and things like that were, but nobody mentions how thoroughly contemptible and beatdown-worthy Another Bad Creation were. Kids with no talent rapping like they're gonna beat your ass, and they're like 8 years old?? Sounds to me like 4 or 5 asses begging for a size-12 steel boot. I don't know where they are today, but I hope it's hell.
Also, I despise Eminem. That whiny, whiny voice acting all hard... reminds me of Another Bad Creation.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
clara:
I'm not even sure what most of those songs are, but I'm guessing they're the reason I don't really listen to the radio.
alhim:
Have Dean and Gene Ween on your profile image and I think that is pretty cool. My friend just got the new live dvd/cd thing and said it was really good.