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charlie

NEW YAWK

SG Since 2003

Followers 4085 Following 149

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Wednesday Feb 06, 2013

Feb 5, 2013
3
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As I look back on all my sets, I realize how many of them feature me smoking....

I began my addiction to nicotine with that first cigarette at age 13. I was always kickin it with the older kids, skaters, stoners, etc, and one of these kids worked the little cigarette booth outside of the gas station, so it was as easy as passing him the money for a pack of Salems (I really liked the image of the robot lady I saw in magazines). I took a walk the night I got the pack...I tried to smoke one, recalling all the procedure I had heard about, and made sure to actually inhale. Naturally, I got ridiculously ill....I got rid of the pack and didn't buy another.

Until the grunge became goth, and I discovered cloves. They had this sensual appeal, they were all black, and I thought they made a pretty hot prop. Now, as we all know, you are not supposed to actually inhale clove cigarettes, but you inevitably end up taking in some smoke whether you like it or not. Eventually, I was coughing up blood (cloves are far harsher than cigarettes) so I decided that I had better switch to American Spirits. And there I was, smoking smoking smoking, for the next twelve years.

UNTIL NOW!!!!

I have finally decided to release myself from the wack ass bondage of this bullshit drug addiction. And it feels great. As dorky as I feel admitting this, I read the Allen Carr book, and it actually really helped me. I don't often endorse things, but I would recommend it to anyone who wants to quit (And hey, I shoplifted it anyway, the line at the bookstore was too long and I had a movie to catch).

As I look back on all these sets, I see that I really did think smoking was part of my sexuality....I always thought I got great pleasure from smoking, which is why you see it so often. Even if I was on the other side of the lens, I was probably smoking then too. But now, I realize how poisonous this imagery is...

While SG is a vehicle for erotica, it is also an approximation or barometer of contemporary chic...it is an image machine, and we SG's are here to titillate and tease you in all our sexual confidence and undying coolness.

So today, I'm finding myself a bit ashamed. I'm ashamed to have perpetuated the myth of the smoking hot chick. That same myth has been slowly killing me for over a decade, and I'm just now breaking free.

I heard a rumor that Albertine may be coming to New York sometime soon....if she does, I am promising you all a cigarette free set that shows the new heights of fitness and the brighter complexion I look forward to achieving in my new tobacco free life.

FUCK THE NICOTINE. A DRUG ADDICTION. THAT IS ALL IT IS.



I'm fucking OVER IT!!!
VIEW 22 of 22 COMMENTS
nycstreetpoet:
I happen to think smokingdoes look a little sexy, but I think my interest in has more to do with a subconscious conditioning: smoking is dangerous, men do dangerous things, when women do dangerous things, society marginalizes them. (Think a woman working in (almost) any blue collar job.) Therefore, we look at a woman smoking as "sexy."
As someone who has been on either side of the cigarette, in a manner of speaking, I think it takes a lot of balls (or should I say ovaries - balls aren't exactly strong.) to quit smoking; I don't really understand how addiction works (although Lord knows I have my addictions) but I do know that it takes a lot of overcome them.
Well done, Charlie. This is going to sound stupid, but I'm proud of you and you have my support. smile
Sep 26, 2013
aotearoaaesthete:
That was a fantastic read and very empowering. Ive heard good things about Allen Carr's book. Hows your success going so far? just in case you have/ever relapsed into smoking again, because damn that shit really is hard to break off, keep on trucking at it and don't despair. Long term successful quitters have on average like 6-7 failed attempts before success AFAIK.
Oct 23, 2013

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