Havent been in the writing mood much lately. Ive been back on the site for about a week now so I figure Ill let people know whats going on with me.
I live in a small town called Yantis Tx now. Not a damn thing here. I have to drive about 15 min to Sulpher springs where I work (Sally beauty). I fucking hate working there! They are a bunch of 2 faced cunts that think they are better than me because they already have there beauty license or bc I have a different outlook on life. I actually caught one of the girls drinking beer at work. The funny thing is that the manager is the one that let her bring it to work. Did she get fired . . . not at all. She even leaves for hours on end and doesn't clock out. Is she still there. . . HEll yeah!!! I hate country folk!!!!
God. . . now Cody just IM'ed me . . . .Fuck. I just want him to leave me alone so I can have a chance to move on. Ok so here is the story with that. We have been apart for a long while now. I was doing fine. Getting my shit together. Moving on. Then he popped up again and wanted to start "talking" again. I was stoked. I always felt horrible for the way things turned out. But I figured Id never have a chance to make it right so I just put in the back of my mind. So we went on a date. It went really well. We laughed and talked and had this amazing kiss at the end of the night. I was convinced things would work out for us.
Well I guess I pushed it too hard. I went into it with good intentions. I thought Id have my second chance. But I knew I wanted things to go serious. I couldnt have it any other way. I couldnt be casual with someone that I was still madly in love with. The second date didnt go so well. I told him how I felt. Yeah . . . he didnt dig that. I guess he just wanted his cake and to eat it too. He wanted me around but wanted to still party and gamble and all that. Which is fine! I think we could have had a healthy medium. But he didnt agree. He has gotten used to being a bachelor when i want is to be his wife. Thats all i ever wanted. . . .Shit thats why i left in the first damn place. Cuz I knew he thought "why buy the cow when youre getting the milk for free". As cliche as it sounds I know thats why after 2 years he never purposed.
I hate the I feel so strongly about it. But he feels just as strong about his independence. The two just dont mix.
Gosh i didnt plan on writing anything about him. Im stil so hurt by it. I think about him everyday. I even hurt a really good guy because of my feeling for Cody. Which only proved the guy was pyscho so I guess its bitter sweet. If Chris thinks Im talking to him again after he told me "Go ahead and kill yourself. Get it over with. . ." he has another thing coming!
Ok so now im trying to let go of all the drama and continue moving forward. . . Im gathering money to get back into Dallas. Im just not going to be able to go to school here. So I know none of that was good news. I sound like a ranting bitch. . . but thats how life has been lately. Hopefully better things and men are on the horizon.
Blessed be . . .
Ohh here is a pic of my halloween makeup!!! Turned out rad. . . .
I live in a small town called Yantis Tx now. Not a damn thing here. I have to drive about 15 min to Sulpher springs where I work (Sally beauty). I fucking hate working there! They are a bunch of 2 faced cunts that think they are better than me because they already have there beauty license or bc I have a different outlook on life. I actually caught one of the girls drinking beer at work. The funny thing is that the manager is the one that let her bring it to work. Did she get fired . . . not at all. She even leaves for hours on end and doesn't clock out. Is she still there. . . HEll yeah!!! I hate country folk!!!!
God. . . now Cody just IM'ed me . . . .Fuck. I just want him to leave me alone so I can have a chance to move on. Ok so here is the story with that. We have been apart for a long while now. I was doing fine. Getting my shit together. Moving on. Then he popped up again and wanted to start "talking" again. I was stoked. I always felt horrible for the way things turned out. But I figured Id never have a chance to make it right so I just put in the back of my mind. So we went on a date. It went really well. We laughed and talked and had this amazing kiss at the end of the night. I was convinced things would work out for us.
Well I guess I pushed it too hard. I went into it with good intentions. I thought Id have my second chance. But I knew I wanted things to go serious. I couldnt have it any other way. I couldnt be casual with someone that I was still madly in love with. The second date didnt go so well. I told him how I felt. Yeah . . . he didnt dig that. I guess he just wanted his cake and to eat it too. He wanted me around but wanted to still party and gamble and all that. Which is fine! I think we could have had a healthy medium. But he didnt agree. He has gotten used to being a bachelor when i want is to be his wife. Thats all i ever wanted. . . .Shit thats why i left in the first damn place. Cuz I knew he thought "why buy the cow when youre getting the milk for free". As cliche as it sounds I know thats why after 2 years he never purposed.
I hate the I feel so strongly about it. But he feels just as strong about his independence. The two just dont mix.
Gosh i didnt plan on writing anything about him. Im stil so hurt by it. I think about him everyday. I even hurt a really good guy because of my feeling for Cody. Which only proved the guy was pyscho so I guess its bitter sweet. If Chris thinks Im talking to him again after he told me "Go ahead and kill yourself. Get it over with. . ." he has another thing coming!
Ok so now im trying to let go of all the drama and continue moving forward. . . Im gathering money to get back into Dallas. Im just not going to be able to go to school here. So I know none of that was good news. I sound like a ranting bitch. . . but thats how life has been lately. Hopefully better things and men are on the horizon.
Blessed be . . .
Ohh here is a pic of my halloween makeup!!! Turned out rad. . . .
Sorry you had so much trouble with Cody, I know you will find a good man.
Sexy makeup.