cbomb

i think the excuse is lame myself....the distance doesnt bother me.....the fact he likes me and isnt willing to give it a chance does....the fact that he wants to move here in a year and isnt caling me now is bothering me....the whole "i neeed time" bullshit he's pulling is bothering me....

the fact that i still like him REALLY bothers me

im just really fukin sad right now and he said he would call so we could finish talking and he hasnt....i dont think he will...and it sucks

So I needed to get last weeks drama off my chest before this wknd......and before i go crazy...

I wanted a fun friday night but that almost never happens.

I hate the be the honest one. But i have to get it out. she is so moody it kills me. it kills us all. seriously. she was having a great time, until we got to the bar and then she becomes quiet, boring and moody, and no one wants to talk to her. everyone around us asks us "is your friend alwasy that mean and grumpy looking?" and we have no choice but to either lie and say no or be honest and say yes.

well im sick of spending friday nights sitting at the bar talking to other ppl, or trying to sueeze conversation out of a rock. Denver is right, we are two different people and its amazing we are friends.

With Alissa its so easy to see why we are best friends we are the same person, we are drunkk and crazy and everyone thinks we are dumb, when really we are just damn good liars...but honestly....

with alix.....that whole opposites thing...the balancing act sometimes wears me thin. dont get me wrong. I love her. and i need her in my life, but sometimes i cant be her mom and make sure she is ok and having fun. last night she wigged coz we left her with liang but im sorry, she never told us she wanted to have fun...and if she always sits there like a lump we assume she wants to. she never gets up to dance and party with us. she never smiles with us and talks to people. so why wouldnt we assume she wants to sit??

I'm sorry but if you're gonna be the boring one you're gonna end up the bag and coat minder. you have to tell us wot your thinking. no matter how many tricks I have and how cool i am, a mind reader i am not.

ANYWAY. that whole thing was insane coz she cant stop herself from screaming at bar. this was just like last summer at keybar, she has to make a scene in front of friends. its gross and stupid. way to embarrass yourself hunny.

moving onto wot ruined my night tho? because the alix thing wont last very long.

DAN FUCKING ORTIZ SHOWED UP AT MY BAR WITH ROB! wtf. i bring them there once so i could see dan and now they go all the time???? thats bullshit. you dont do that. its bar ettiquette that you dont take someone;s spot. its my fukin escape bar. i go there to escape ppl i know. i have my party regs there. i go there to see my wknd family, my tuesday night i had a bad day fam...not my "hey this guy has a crush on me" family. how can i meet people if i have dan grabbing my ass, touching me...trying to fucking hug me and rob asking wots up every 5 seconds??? and the most annoying thin?? THEY DIDNT GET WHY I WAS PISSED OFF. I tried to explain to connor and get them kicked out and he did for a while but then he let them back in. I'm so mad. I hope they never come there again. I didnt mean for them to get mad at me about it its just. FIND YOUR OWN FUCKKING SPOT DUDES!!!!! this is my fukin place. i go there to escape people i know. and now that they are there, i may never b able to go again. and thats not fucking fair. so my night was ruined.

and now for the finale. I drunk dialed "the boy" as alix calls him tooooo many times and dont rememeber all that i said but im sure ive said something wrong and said toooo much and bet he hates me now :*(

ohhh the drama


sad. sad weekend

hopefully today is better coz im gonna see megans first time as a costume designer!! YAY!!!!