As some notable dates have come, gone, and are continuing to approach, I've spent a lot of time reflecting on all the changes in my life, especially in this last year.
In July of last year, I had a very open conversation with my husband about wanting to explore kink and requesting to have someone with experience be the one to guide me. That person just happened to be someone I had met years before, had become acquainted with better and better as I joined my career path and then ended up working with me and we got closer as friends. I wanted these experiences as a way to explore my own body and autonomy, to find a way to let go and give control to someone else, as I had to be in control in so many other places in my life, to feel supported when even my own body didn't want to support me (yay chronic pain!) I began experiencing and fell in love with my masochistic side, she revels in the aches and bruises after deep impact, the relief given, and I also got to learn my polyamorous side had been waiting to show herself.
In August, things started getting emotional around the house with my best friend and housemate. I was starting to venture out more, going to the Bombshell Revue's shows that I am now so wonderfully involved in, going out of the house more. Husband was enjoying it too. At the end of August my sweet bunny, Wednesday the 13th passed away. He was almost 8 years old. I also finally finished my degree!
In early September, my best friend and housemate also passed away after a long battle with his own chronic illnesses. I won't go into details. It hurt ..deeply and badly, and it still does, but there's also a sense of relief, for him, and for me emotionally, no longer feeling guilty for wanting to have a life outside of my home and fearing leaving him out. There's a lot to unpack there (yay therapy!) It was also the same time that I said I love you to my kink partner, who had been so beautifully there for me emotionally and physically, opening space for me to explore myself and him.
In October, husband decided to also explore for himself some other partnerships, all the while communicating with me our wants and desires. We celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary with a lovely trip, but also got to share our happiness about and with our other partners. We pushed and had our usual Halloween party though it was a bit hard emotionally without the housemate, we had new friends over to enjoy with us, and both of our partners.
In early November, after many talks, my kink partner and I decided on an official collaring. He has been my Sir. We crafted my collar together, and you may have seen it in some of the photos I post, the purple braided cord with the large engraved lock. It is one of my most treasured moments and items. He locks it on me for scenes and for outings. The weight of it grounds me. He also got me the most wonderful birthday present, one that showcased my hard work and my weird and nerdy side, an Undertaker wrestling belt, which is proudly on display in my office.
In February I passed my state licensing exams and have been working my ass off supporting my community. I have been active in many shows and kink events through the Bombshell and Haus of Debauchery. I've grown more confident in myself every day. I've experienced public kink play and made many new friends in the community who I feel I can truly relate to. They have become some of my most treasured friends and occasional partners 😉
In April, I added a new partner to my life, and he is also wonderful. I will say I have a type! Bald men with beards! I love and adore him so very much too.
In June, husband and I sat down with each set of parents and told them that we are polyamorous, bisexual, and not having children. I also dropped a bit of the kink with my family. They were wonderfully accepting and just happy we are happy
Recently, we actually had a potluck with what we lovingly refer to as the Poly Pocket. Husband and his partner, me with mine, and their partners. And it was just lovely getting to sit and talk with everyone.
I have been truly loving the me that I have been able to explore and embrace. For the first time in a long time I feel I can fully embrace who I am.
Thanks for being along for the ride. I'm trying to work on something special for you all. But for now you'll just get random show pictures
