c0rpse

Do we as people ever get over the relationships we build? It is beomcing more and more aparant to me that I will never fully be able to handle love, loss, family and friends. Ill never be able to grasp how truely important they are to me until it is too late. This feeling has been growing inside me. Even if I got to a point where I was happy with the decisions I had made, will I be truely happy when it is all over?

I have never been good at handling loss, especially death, but it has always been so removed. In the past I have had severe problems with dealing with my mortality, but even that doesn't compare.

I need to come up with a fool proof plan to tighten my personal reltionships..to stop being such a fucking ass and start appreciating what I have before its too late. As time goes on and I live my life, buying meaningless things and doing meaninglless things....I truely feel that people are all that we really have.

How am I expected to deal with the fact that I won't be able to share my entire life with the people I want. People come and go....but in my heart there are people I never want to let go...I want to shre my life and experience with them. This is a concept I barely understand but, I want them to be by my side. forever.