Hahaha. This week is definitely on my top ten list of shittiest weeks ever.
Just when you thought it couldn't get bad enough with Amelie's escape (previous journal) and skirmishes with my friends, the ultimate bad, bad thing happens. I go over to Josie's to see if she'd like to go shopping, right? I get close to knock on the door, but hear her and Kristen talking about me and how I invited her to come party at a strip club with me tomorrow night:
"You know, I really don't want to go to that thing tomorrow...just like I didn't want to go clubbing with her"-Josie
"Really? You could have just gone with her and maybe found another girl to hang out with. **Laughs*"-Kristen
"Ah, i'll just go with her tomorrow anyway. Maybe i'll get lucky with her." -Josie (Proceeds to talk even more about weed because she's a bigger pothead than my psychotic ex...I compose myself and walk away.)
Hahaha. You might get lucky with me? Bitch, keep dreaming. You don't have a chance in hell with me now. What, do you think i'm a dork, because i'm not Abercrombie like you are? Because maybe i'm a little more artistic and articulate?
No. No I will not go down like this. Those things she said were like a slap in the face. This is why I don't like having crushes on people. I'm glad she thought I was a horrible person or whatever just from the few hours we've hung out. Glad.
I will become Woman#3, demon. I refuse to be the good virginal schoolgirl, I will demolish everything in my path. I'm tired of being seen as either a dork or a slut, what horrible things to see me as. Nobody really knows me, except for maybe the people who read my journals, because they reveal more about me than people in real life will ever know.
Somewhere inside, I tell myself I am a strong and beautiful girl, that someone will appreciate it someday, but I won't beg for affection anymore, i'll sit on a pedestal and be like all of the other 10,000 wounded, sad sad dykes in SF that get worshipped. Worship me, worship me, and maybe I will be good enough to let you buy me a drink. You are my slave, I am your mistress.
I am not a dork, I am not a whore. Might get lucky with me? Oh what a sad mistake. I might have been a slut with N, but I won't make that same mistake twice, fuck her. I'm nobody's whore.
I'm listening to Ani D because i've decided I am going to listen to Ani D and be a hurt wounded rebel just like every other sad sad butch daddy in SF. Just. Like. Everyone. Else.
"I could be the million that you never made, you're looking at the million that YOU NEVER MADE." -Ani D.
DL it. It's the themesong for anyone that feels me on this journal entry.
Oh yeah, and i'm not a lesbian anymore, I quit.
Just when you thought it couldn't get bad enough with Amelie's escape (previous journal) and skirmishes with my friends, the ultimate bad, bad thing happens. I go over to Josie's to see if she'd like to go shopping, right? I get close to knock on the door, but hear her and Kristen talking about me and how I invited her to come party at a strip club with me tomorrow night:
"You know, I really don't want to go to that thing tomorrow...just like I didn't want to go clubbing with her"-Josie
"Really? You could have just gone with her and maybe found another girl to hang out with. **Laughs*"-Kristen
"Ah, i'll just go with her tomorrow anyway. Maybe i'll get lucky with her." -Josie (Proceeds to talk even more about weed because she's a bigger pothead than my psychotic ex...I compose myself and walk away.)
Hahaha. You might get lucky with me? Bitch, keep dreaming. You don't have a chance in hell with me now. What, do you think i'm a dork, because i'm not Abercrombie like you are? Because maybe i'm a little more artistic and articulate?
No. No I will not go down like this. Those things she said were like a slap in the face. This is why I don't like having crushes on people. I'm glad she thought I was a horrible person or whatever just from the few hours we've hung out. Glad.
I will become Woman#3, demon. I refuse to be the good virginal schoolgirl, I will demolish everything in my path. I'm tired of being seen as either a dork or a slut, what horrible things to see me as. Nobody really knows me, except for maybe the people who read my journals, because they reveal more about me than people in real life will ever know.
Somewhere inside, I tell myself I am a strong and beautiful girl, that someone will appreciate it someday, but I won't beg for affection anymore, i'll sit on a pedestal and be like all of the other 10,000 wounded, sad sad dykes in SF that get worshipped. Worship me, worship me, and maybe I will be good enough to let you buy me a drink. You are my slave, I am your mistress.
I am not a dork, I am not a whore. Might get lucky with me? Oh what a sad mistake. I might have been a slut with N, but I won't make that same mistake twice, fuck her. I'm nobody's whore.
I'm listening to Ani D because i've decided I am going to listen to Ani D and be a hurt wounded rebel just like every other sad sad butch daddy in SF. Just. Like. Everyone. Else.
"I could be the million that you never made, you're looking at the million that YOU NEVER MADE." -Ani D.
DL it. It's the themesong for anyone that feels me on this journal entry.
Oh yeah, and i'm not a lesbian anymore, I quit.
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ps maybe you should go on the internet and look at some pictures of big dicks before you declare yourself eminem fan of the year. =)