I was a fat little kid.
A sweaty, fat little kid. And I drank a lot of soda. So was a sweaty, fat caffeinated kid. Who peed a lot.
My sister and I used to spend our summers at my grandmother's house in Budd Lake, NJ because there was lots of trees and land and the aforementioned lake for summer funness. But since I was a fat, sweaty, overcaffinated kid who peed a lot, I spent most of my time running in an out of my house to use the bathroom. And it used to make my grandmother all sorts of angry.
"In or out! I don't wanna hear that door slam again!"
So I took to peeing in the woods outside of her house, which worked much better for me, until I got poison ivy on my penis.
And not only was I fat and sweaty and overcaffinated, but I wasn't too bright. And I had NO idea what was happening to my lower extremities, all I knew is that they felt funny. And I scratched them a lot. But I was ashamed of what was going on down there. So I didn't tell anyone about it.
My grandmother was predictably horrified when she caught me with my hands down my pants at the dinner table. And she was more horrified when I couldn't seem to stop touching myself. After being yelled at and being taken aside for a stern lecture on the importance of not touching yourself in public, the truth of the matter was arrived at and my poison ivy was discovered. I was taken to the hospital and informed that my poison ivy had become infected. I was rushed into the emergency room where a half dozen doctors stared at me with my pants around my ankles.
That memory still scars me to this day.
If I asked you what your most embarrassing memory was, what's the first memory that comes to your mind?
(Hexe and Severus have already played this game with me and I loved both of their stories, which inspired me to ask all of you.)
A sweaty, fat little kid. And I drank a lot of soda. So was a sweaty, fat caffeinated kid. Who peed a lot.
My sister and I used to spend our summers at my grandmother's house in Budd Lake, NJ because there was lots of trees and land and the aforementioned lake for summer funness. But since I was a fat, sweaty, overcaffinated kid who peed a lot, I spent most of my time running in an out of my house to use the bathroom. And it used to make my grandmother all sorts of angry.
"In or out! I don't wanna hear that door slam again!"
So I took to peeing in the woods outside of her house, which worked much better for me, until I got poison ivy on my penis.
And not only was I fat and sweaty and overcaffinated, but I wasn't too bright. And I had NO idea what was happening to my lower extremities, all I knew is that they felt funny. And I scratched them a lot. But I was ashamed of what was going on down there. So I didn't tell anyone about it.
My grandmother was predictably horrified when she caught me with my hands down my pants at the dinner table. And she was more horrified when I couldn't seem to stop touching myself. After being yelled at and being taken aside for a stern lecture on the importance of not touching yourself in public, the truth of the matter was arrived at and my poison ivy was discovered. I was taken to the hospital and informed that my poison ivy had become infected. I was rushed into the emergency room where a half dozen doctors stared at me with my pants around my ankles.
That memory still scars me to this day.
If I asked you what your most embarrassing memory was, what's the first memory that comes to your mind?
(Hexe and Severus have already played this game with me and I loved both of their stories, which inspired me to ask all of you.)
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Have been a little unproductive today, but that's mostly 'cos I've got a long list of mundane things to get done (that bloody tax return!!) before I can get stuck into the juicy fun stuff.
And how is Chris?