I got the Live Aid DVD for Christmas. Damn Bono had some mullet in 1985!!!!!
This is the best thing that happened Christmas day: my cousin Neil and his wife told everyone this great story about a friend of theirs who had just been outted living a lifelong lie. This guy claimed to be pre-med when they met him 7 years ago. He then went to med school and was now interning at a local hospital-or at least that's what he told everyone, including his WIFE and his parents. Well it was all a lie. He had dropped out of college in his sophomore year and was working as a caddy at a local golf course. The money his parents gave him for college was all put away, he staged his own college graduation and simply told his parents and then-girlfriend (now wife) that he chose not to walk and participate in the ceremony because he didn't know his classmates enough. His wife began suspecting things for about a year ago and finally hired a private detective to track him and it his whole lie was exposed. She has since left him, by the way.
So this is where it gets funny: my cousin Brendan, who is 38, went to law school and graduated 3 or 4 years ago. He took the bar and failed but his mother, my Aunt Mary, told everyone in the family that he PASSED. Why? I have no idea. She's my dad's older sister and they grew up really poor. Maybe she just wanted to feel like her family achieved something, I don't know.
So the point is that everyone in our family thinks that Brendan is a lawyer. It's insane. He's a grown man living a lie because his mother lied on his behalf. My sister and I know the truth because his brother's wife likes to gossip, but everyone thinks he's a lawyer. I'm not kidding. He gets away with it because he's a stay at home dad (his wife really IS a lawyer), but everyone assumes that's by choice.
Anyway, Neil is telling this story about his friend who is living a lie and my father, thinking he's being funny, says, "Hey Brendan, is that why you're not working? Because you never really got a law degree?" And Brendan turns beat red and laughs the most awkward laugh imaginable. And my sister and I exchanged looks.
And the moment seemed to hang there forever.
This is the best thing that happened Christmas day: my cousin Neil and his wife told everyone this great story about a friend of theirs who had just been outted living a lifelong lie. This guy claimed to be pre-med when they met him 7 years ago. He then went to med school and was now interning at a local hospital-or at least that's what he told everyone, including his WIFE and his parents. Well it was all a lie. He had dropped out of college in his sophomore year and was working as a caddy at a local golf course. The money his parents gave him for college was all put away, he staged his own college graduation and simply told his parents and then-girlfriend (now wife) that he chose not to walk and participate in the ceremony because he didn't know his classmates enough. His wife began suspecting things for about a year ago and finally hired a private detective to track him and it his whole lie was exposed. She has since left him, by the way.
So this is where it gets funny: my cousin Brendan, who is 38, went to law school and graduated 3 or 4 years ago. He took the bar and failed but his mother, my Aunt Mary, told everyone in the family that he PASSED. Why? I have no idea. She's my dad's older sister and they grew up really poor. Maybe she just wanted to feel like her family achieved something, I don't know.
So the point is that everyone in our family thinks that Brendan is a lawyer. It's insane. He's a grown man living a lie because his mother lied on his behalf. My sister and I know the truth because his brother's wife likes to gossip, but everyone thinks he's a lawyer. I'm not kidding. He gets away with it because he's a stay at home dad (his wife really IS a lawyer), but everyone assumes that's by choice.
Anyway, Neil is telling this story about his friend who is living a lie and my father, thinking he's being funny, says, "Hey Brendan, is that why you're not working? Because you never really got a law degree?" And Brendan turns beat red and laughs the most awkward laugh imaginable. And my sister and I exchanged looks.
And the moment seemed to hang there forever.
VIEW 18 of 18 COMMENTS
severus:
Yeah, I sure can't afford it anyway 
I'm leaving tomorrow / today late at night. Now it's like 4.30 in the morning and I'm finally tired enough to go to bed. Love / i.
I'm leaving tomorrow / today late at night. Now it's like 4.30 in the morning and I'm finally tired enough to go to bed. Love / i.
kitten:
shit! what is that address? we may need to update...yeah, i read that, i forgot to mention it. that's rad! little steven liked my record! fuck yeah! sorry you didn't get to see Life Aquatic, i'm sure it won't be long. see, living in a state full of ignorant rednecks isn't always bad....getting into good movies isn't that hard....i still feel like 
tho. hope you're doing better.....
tho. hope you're doing better.....