beautifulxalone

I've had a little too much to t h i n k tonight.....



you know what's the WORST?
when you talk about wanting to do something (like go to Medieval Times for FIVE DOLLARS with my school on a bustrip -- but instead I had to go to work and make TWENTY DOLLARS in SIX HOURS. yeah. good day.) and then you hear that your...
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I feel like I've just been hit in the face with a metal bat.
my heart stopped, and I actually couldn't breathe for a minute.
But for some reason I can't even cry.

This is just like a bad dream that won't ever end -- and it just gets worse and worse, and more absurd by the minute.

love? already? you've only been dating a...
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In the days of kings and queens, I was a jester...

I'm trying to find a balance, I'm trying to build a balance...



I'm not really too sure why I'm awake right now...

I passed out so well earlier too. Too much to smoke tonight, too much on my mind [as usual].

I'm going to start looking for another job to work at during christmas...
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slowly but surely...

days go by and still i think of you -- days where i couldn't live my life w i t h o u t you...


i talked to justin online for the first time in awhile...we had a REAL conversation. just bullshitting about movies and books and life in general. he told me his parents were asking about me and i bit...
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I should just get wishful thinking tattooed on my forehead.

































...

I'm not really sure what to do right now.
I should go to sleep.
My eyes are so tired...
I have class @ 8 AM tomorrow.

Today was horrendous, like I expected it to be...but I never expected it to be such a slap in the face as it was...

All I feel is hurt and resentment and sorrow and guilt.
Wishing to turn back...
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Happy Halloween, SG.

I'm currently procrastinating.

Here's what's been up ::

...I'm going to have to take 20 credits next semester in order to graduate with my class in May. This means a 5-class course load, an internship, and an Independent Study with my FAVORITE professor. All of that other stuff is a given...(this was the first semester that I got all of the classes...
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i wish it were possible for me to crawl into bed until the rain stops.
until it's warm and sunny again.
until i've graduated college and all the bullshit is done.
i'm glad i stayed up til 1 AM last night writing a paper that was supposed to be due this morning, but when we arrived @ class, found out that she's not having it...
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I have two huge tests tomorrow. I missed a quiz last week that I have to make up as well. I also have Spanish homework, and I have to study for the second test after taking the first test. I'm proud of myself for diligently studying, and actually getting my notecards done before the night before the test. I feel confident, for once.

I bought...
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