bairdduvessa

Its not that Im pessimistic, nor ignorant. I've loved, and I've convinved myself to love even though I wasn't in it. Why does our species search for it? I cannot grasp it at all. Its been 5 years 6 months since I stopped dating. 5 years since I stopped "seeing" a girl. 6 years since I've been sexualy active.
Is it my Hermitacy that causes me to question whether or not relationships and emontions such as love exist? If so why do I crush so easily on the women that I meet?

Why do I allow myself to fantasize when I 1. know it'll crash down around me 2. not really care about relationships?

Sure I'd love to have some one to hold at night, but really thats it.