avalon

my life is so redundent. i feel like a machine. get up- got to work- come home- sit on the internet- go to sleep- do it again. i wish my life had more meaning but alas- i have no life.i just wish i could trust someone.

i got paid today and i should be happy but money means nothing to me. i know i have to have it but that it as far as it goes.

i need to find an apartment pronto. no more living with the ex boyfriend. that is weak...

but i bought some cute hello kitty pj's and that does make me happy

i told a friend of mine that i was an SG and she was not very excited. i mean everyone has their opinions and i respect hers. but i feel i need to express myself. i have so much i need to get out. all the insecurity. i mean what better way to say i am not ashamed of my body than to get naked in front of thousands? i think it takes balls and strong will to do that- especially if you have self esteem issues. not to say i think i am ugly or anything. i am just average. but everyone has their things with thier apperence. this just helps me exorcize the demon.

wOOt